Life.

12/20/10

2010-12-20T17:35:00.000-08:00

Goodbye blogspot.
Hello tumblr.
loves-a.

12.05.10

2010-12-05T11:58:00.000-08:00

Been reflecting this morning. . .
thinking back from where I've came
remembering the good times and the bad
thinking about the future
dreaming of doors opening
realizing how simple it all is
..................
listening to iTunes on shuffle this morning
reading through old blogs
thinking about this holiday season
a couple of blogs I wrote back in the day
reminded me of the important things
I love giving gifts...
I hate spending money on myself...
I'm just not good at it (which I think is a good quality of mine)
but this year... we're probably the brokest (yea that's not a word I know) we've ever been
so much that there will be no gift giving....
but lots of time spent loving..being..living
and maybe making mix cds...
........
i've been missing my family pretty bad lately...still.
But we get to see them this weekend...
reuniting in the lovely Bend, Oregon for 3 nights/4days
it will be glorious...
I don't care if we even leave the house..
just want to spend time hanging around the kitchen with them
sitting by the fire
my family...they're amazing.
................
I think there will be some exciting things to blog about in the future (and no, I am not pregnant!)...
I just feel like good stuff is going to happen.
love you all.
-a.

11.7.1x2

2010-11-07T11:10:00.001-08:00

Ok...I'm really going to try to do this blogging about cooking thing again... just for you, Ninja ;)
This week..I didn't really cook much, still being as frugal as possible until Jeremy gets home from tour, and therefore, gets paid. So this week's exciting cooking adventure didn't happen until Friday night, when my friends, Laura and Kaysha, invited me over for dinner. These girls are great, and so much fun to be in their tiny little kitchen with. Well, the kitchen isn't that small, but the lack of counter space makes it seem like we're always in each others' way....but I kind of like that.
Anyway, I asked Laura if I could do anything to help, as the only thing that was cooking, was the rice in the rice cooker (way to go, Kaysha! :) And her response was that I could get the chicken cooking. Done. On a whim, Laura (the ever talented and daring baker among us) decided to make these home-made dumplings, filled with her (amazing!) home-made applesauce....So, I was more than willing to help her with cooking dinner...
So, I got the chicken nice and browned and then asked Laura if I could do anything else. Sure, saute the garlic and shallots until they're crispy. Okay, I can do that. Next, deglaze the pan with some chicken stock. Yep, can do that too. Now, add some heavy cream. Done. Next, some freshly minced tarragon and how about some lemon zest. Done and done. Time to eat.
Essentially, I cooked a delicious dinner, Tarragon Chicken. I teased Laura about inviting me over for dinner and then making me cook...but I enjoyed EVERY minute of it....here are my reasons why...
(for those of you that think I'm an amazing cook...I'm not that amazing...)
-I follow recipes
-I occasionally mix things up a bit, but normally not after following the recipe, strictly, the first time
-I felt empowered (such a strange word to use....)
-I felt creative
-I felt natural
.....plus, it was one of the best meals I've had in a long time......Laura, thank you for making me make dinner ;)
so let's see...a recipe...
saute your chicken in some olive oil until browned and cooked through... and don't forget to season with salt and pepper (this was the only time I used S&P too...and it was the best sauce I think I've ever had)
-I left the chicken in the pan while I made the sauce (in the same pan), but you could remove it after cooking and then add back in after you've completed the sauce
-add a couple cloves minced garlic and 1 shallot thinly sliced (two of my favorite vegetables) and cook till crisp, but not burnt (you shouldn't have to add any extra oil..)
-deglaze the pan with a cup or so of chicken stock, scraping up all those browned-goodness-crumbs on the bottom of the pan
-sprinkle some flour over the surface (or you could mix it in with the cream if you're afraid of lumps...but I didn't have any) and whisk until you get a creamy consistency (I guess you could actually add the flour in after you've cooked the shallots & garlic, that's how most recipes go...but the flour was an after thought, to ensure an extra creamy sauce..)
-once the flour is incorporated, stir in a cup of heavy cream (you could use 1/2&1/2 of even regular milk..but really? ... c'mon, you deserve a rich, creamy sauce every once in a while) and cook until sauce has thickened up nicely.
-add a little lemon zest and then squeeze 1/2 a lemon into the sauce and stir....
-add a couple tbs. of freshly minced tarragon
and wha-la...dinner is done. I highly recommend serving over rice or maybe a smaller pasta, as you don't want to lose any of the sauce on your plate, and that way, you don't have to be rude and lick your plate.
So there ya go...please make this some time..you won't regret it. Oh, and as always, this meal is best when shared.
loves-a.

11.07.10

2010-11-07T10:45:00.000-08:00

Woke up this morning with a smile on my face...
(despite the fact that I woke up to the sound of my neighbors' little kids singing in the shower, at the top of their lungs...)
seeing the pink and orange horizon, as I woke up on Jeremy's side of the bed, was just what I needed this a.m.
One thing I love about living in our place...having our bedroom on the second floor, allows me to sleep with the blinds open, so I can awake to the glimpses of the sun making it's appearance.
I think that extra hour of sleep was rather nice as well...
(despite the fact that I still woke up countless times during the night, hopefully, that will end as soon as Jeremy is home..)

I had a good week. I have some really great friends up here. Great women in my life that are such a joy in my life to be around. For the earlier part of Jeremy being gone on tour, I felt like I was in the wrong place. I was feeling sorry for myself and staying in...not wanting to impose on anybodies lives up here. I was feeling like we'd made the wrong decision in picking up and moving to Idaho. I was feeling like maybe we'd moved for all the wrong reasons.....
but then....I started hanging out with our friends up here, again. And I was reminded that yea...this is where we're supposed to be right now. It's amazing to think that we've been here almost half a year (okay, not until December). . . and how much I've changed. Or should I say, how much I am like my old self nowadays.
the Amy that....
talked with Jesus every day
was able to just hang out with no stresses
made people laugh
laughed
wrote in her journal on a semi-regular basis
was able to find joy in the mundane things of life
dreamed, constantly
wasn't so caught up in work, to actually enjoy life.
Anyway...
this book I've been reading (Forgotten God-by Francis Chan) has been just what I needed in my life right now (in addition to once again reading my Bible daily). I am such an independent person with so much of my life...that it has slowly invaded my faith in God. Yes, I know that God is always in control, but being able to lay down "my" control...that's another thing. Control...it's a funny thing to think about sometimes....
I mean, really, what is so attractive about control?
Yet, I was always trying to have control over....
-finances
-the next 5 years
-my marriage
-daily life
-my faith
Yet, in trying to have control over my life, I have lost a certain part of my faith. .. that is a vital part of continuing my relationship with Jesus...and not only continuing, but growing... developing.

"I think we could all agree that living 'according to our sinful flesh' is not what is intended for us as children of God. Yet even so, we often choose to face life's issues and circumstances in exactly the same way as someone without the Spirit of God. We worry, strive, and grieve no differently than unbelievers. While it is true that we are humans like everyone else, it is also true that we are humans with the Spirit of God dwelling in us. Yet, whether consciously or not, we essentially say to God, 'I know You raised Christ from the dead; but the fact is my problems are just too much for You and I need to deal with them by myself.'"

I'm over living my life that way. I'm over dealing with problems on my own. I'm over having control.
I'm ready to trust again. I'm ready to believe in the power of God. I'm ready to recognize the Spirit of God moving in my life.

11.02.10

2010-11-02T09:30:00.000-07:00

something I've been chewing on out of a book I'm reading...

"I think the fear of God failing us leads us to 'cover for God.' This means we ask less, expect less, and are satisfied with less because we are afraid to ask for or expect more. We even convince ourselves that we don't want more---that we have all the 'God' we need or could want. I can't imagine how much it pains God to see His children hold back from relationship with the Holy Spirit out of fear that He won't come through. How much it grieves him to watch His children ignore the promises He's mad throughout Scriptures due to fear that those promises won't be kept! Empowering His children with the strength of the Holy Spirit is something the Father wants to do. It's not something we have to talk Him into. he genuinely wants to see us walk in His strength.
When Jesus was on earth, He said to His disciples, 'If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will the heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!' (Luke 11:13). God is a good Father who wants to give good gifts to His children. Sometimes I forget this truth and beg as though He needs convincing. It's as ridiculous as if my kids thought they needed to beg me to hug them. It delights my heart to hug them.
Do you believe that God in heave gives His Spirit to those who ask? Do you really believe it? This truth and what it means is so incredible that no one who actually believes it could then fail to ask for the Holy Spirit."

~Forgotten God~Francis Chan

10.31.10

2010-10-31T15:36:00.001-07:00

Happy Halloween! No dressing up for me this year....Oh wait, I normally don't dress up, that's right...but, I am wearing my black deep-V, does that count?
Just mixed up a batch of peanut butter cookie dough. Couldn't help but think of my mom, as I mixed with my old wooden spoon (remember when I blogged about it?, my favorite utensil...) and followed the recipe out of her old Betty Crocker cookbook. I love looking through this cookbook, noticing the pages with two decade old buttery fingerprints, a brownie batter smear here, a biscuit dough crumb there....
~I had a great childhood~
Anytime I make peanut butter cookies, I can't help but laugh, remembering the one time Jill & I were playing "kitchen"....she was the instructor and I was the student, naturally. Anyway, to make a long story short, instead of 1/4 tsp. of salt, I decided to add 1/4 cup of salt. Needless to say, the dog wouldn't even eat the dough (why we even tried to feed it to her?? Poor, Dusty..) and I failed "kitchen" miserably that day.
This got me thinking...
cooking and being in the kitchen
will always be homey to me.
Full of....
love
memories
joy
hope
laughter
tears
and of course....
delicious baked goods (typically from my mother or sister)
and
savory dishes
prepared, not out of feelings of responsibility
but out of desire and love.

oh.. p.s., that soup I made yesterday, it's even better today.
loves-a.

10.30.10x2

2010-10-30T17:00:00.000-07:00

Per request of my old roommate and long time friend, Ninja, I've decided that at least once a week, I would post something that I've cooked or baked that week....Sometimes I dream about being a foodie blogger..some days I think I could do it..some days I realize I'm not that good with my words. And..I totally forget to take pictures, which is really the whole point of a food blog
...you lure readers in with tantalizing photos of a perfectly roasted turkey or a flawless cheesecake..
good thing there is the world wide web...otherwise you'd just have to imagine how yummy this soup was...
Now, Ninja and I are kind of in the same boat, both of our husbands are gone (granted, I think she wins, with having Kenny deployed in Iraq, while mine is playing music at a bar in So. Cal. tonight)..anyway, cooking for one can be quite depressing, full of salads and grilled cheese. Or you make a dish the way you would to serve 4-6 people, then you're eating that dish for the next 5 days. . .Good thing, Ninja and I are both good cooks, so we don't mind eating our delicious cooking for days on end (and we're both too frugally minded to even contemplate throwing out leftovers--especially homemade leftovers!
so, enough with the writing (see, I just blab..)
we'll call this Hearty Vegetable and Chicken Soup..the original recipe, I think I saw in an old Rachael Ray magazine of mine..and it was called Hearty Chicken and Vegetable Soup..but with the amount of veggies I put in mine, it only made sense to make veggies the star. I think the thing that puts this soup in a class above other Chicken & Vegetable soups, is that you roast the tomatoes...seriously, don't skip this step.
ingredients:
1 lb. plum tomatoes, quartered lengthwise
extra virgin olive oil
salt & pepper
1 lb. boneless skinless chicken breasts
2 onions, chopped
3 ribs celery, chopped
5-6 carrots, peeled & chopped
1 lb. potatoes (I used fingerling but yukon gold would be delicious too) peeled & chopped
1 zucchini halved, and sliced into moons (I used 1/2 a reg. zuc. and a yellow zuc. b/c that's what I had)
4 cups chicken broth (normally I have homemade, but this time I used a box Imagine Organic Free Range--which is my favorite boxed broth)
1/2 lb green beans, trimmed and halved (I used frozen, b/c once again, it's what I had)
a handful of parsley, minced

First step.....
Heat your oven to 500, yes this is hot, but you're going to roast the tomatoes quick-style. Place the tomatoes on a parchment lined baking sheet and drizzle with evoo (extra virgin olive oil) and sprinkle with salt and pepper. Slide those puppies into the oven for 20 minutes. *Around the 10 minute mark I noticed quite a bit of smoke coming from my oven...terrified that my smoke alarm was going off--note, it's not a bad thing for smoke alarms to go off, but this is the first time I've lived in a place that has sprinklers too--and I don't know HOW much smoke it takes to set those babies off* Anyway, the parchment just got a little charred is all and the tomatoes looked delicious. When they're done, put them in a bowl, with any juices that accumulated too.
Second step....
Did you chop all your veggies? You could totally do them now if you wanted, while the tomatoes are roasting. In the mean time, heat your soup pot over medium heat with 1 tbs. of evoo and add the chicken, cooking for 10 minutes, flipping just once. Oh yes, season with salt and pepper, I always figure that goes without saying.. and I imagine that the chicken would be just as good if you roasted it as well, I might try that next time. Anyway, once the chicken is done, set it on a plate and let it cool for at least 10 minutes, so it's cool enough to handle. I shred mine b/c I like the texture of that better in soup, as opposed to chopping it..but do whatever you'd like. That's the beauty of soups :)
Third step...
In the same pot you cooked your chicken in, heat another tbs. of evoo over medium and add your onion, cooking it till soft...about 5 minutes or so (at this point...I thought about putting in some garlic, because I tend to put garlic in everything, but decided against it, wanting all the other veggies' flavors to shine. So after the onion is soft, throw in the carrot, celery, and potatoes (oh yes, don't forget the salt and pepper back when you're cooking up the onions!) Now, you're probably wondering why I didn't just put the carrots and celery in at the same time as the onions, well, good question...going the traditional route of the mirepoix (the holy trinity of the culinary world), you get a lot of soft textures, and I wanted to have a little variance in my soup........
anyway..back to the soup.
So after you add the carrots and what not, go ahead and throw in your broth and cook for about 5 minutes, just simmering.
Fourth step...
Put in your green beans, zucchini, and tomatoes w/their juices, and let this simmer for about 10 minutes, until your potatoes are tender, and then add your shredded chicken (oh yea, I forgot to mention that step...shred your chicken once it's cool :) and your minced parsley.
Then I let it sit on medium low heat for another 10 minutes to let all the flavors blend. So there ya go..
The only thing I would say would make this better is.....
a crusty loaf of bread for dipping
a few friends to share
an apple pie for dessert
loves-a.

10.30.10

2010-10-30T13:03:00.000-07:00

Having a nice, lazy Saturday thus far... slept in till 8. . . lounged around, drank a couple cups of coffee, ate a breakfast of Hemp toast, slathered with Trader Joe's peanut butter (thanks Mom for sending me a jar!) and a sliced banana. Watched a little bit of the news...then turned it off, the news quickly depresses me. Got my butt in gear and did my workout, slacked yesterday and didn't do it...so it hurt extra today...karma...dangit. Took a long, hot shower...put on an old pair of jeans and t-shirt that actually are starting to fit me better! Went down to the mailbox to drop our rent check in the mail...but the mail man came early today..and the September issue of Bon Appetit was in our box..that was a nice surprise, sure wasn't expecting them to send me the back issues since I signed up in September...one of the best $3 I've ever spent, I do believe. Had a simple lunch of leftover brown rice & pine nuts, topped with some yum sauce (I do think I'll be putting that on everything from now on....) and now....working on a couple mixes for some precious people in my life....
sometimes making mixes can be overwhelming, 20.5 days worth of music on my iTunes, it can be hard to canvass the entire music library...So quite often, I put it on shuffle and wait for the inspiration to kick in....And actually, my iTunes (and my iPod in the car) stay on shuffle at least 80% of the time, a good way to hear music I haven't heard in a while...
so, here's what my iTunes has played the past 10 songs...with maybe my favorite line or two....

#1 Ryan Adams "You Will Always Be The Same"
-------- Go on little girl, feet twirl, go and make him smile-------
#2 Minus the Bear "Dr. L'ling"
#3 AU4 "Everything's Moving"
#4 Phil Wickham "Holy, Holy, Holy"
#5 M.I.A. "World Town"
-------Every wall you build I'll knock it down to the floor--------
#6 The Beatles "Hey Jude"
------Remember to let her into your heart, then you can start to make it better------
#7 Fionn Regan "Bunker or Basement"
#8 Wilco "Handshake Drugs"
#9 Au Revoir Simone "Shadows"
-------I'm moving on, I hope you're coming with me. Cause I'm not strong without you------
#10 Karate "First Release"
-------When I'm alone, I want to feel like one kid getting stoned, only to keep things a little more clear, just to be able to hold on to a simple idea. And when I'm with you, I want to notice everything as we do, to catch every bit bit of blur, squint, chill, and red, from sand dunes, San Soliel, and sunsets------

loves-a.

10.28.10

2010-10-28T10:01:00.001-07:00

I can't believe how windy it is outside right now....I feel like I'm over on the Coast..or maybe it's that I wish I was! Either way, I think winter is definitely settling in up here in Idaho, and it won't be too long before I either discover I really DO love the cold or if that's just something I've always said because I hated the heat in Redding.
So this time next week, Jeremy will be home!! Oh man, I seriously cannot wait, my life just doesn't seem complete when he's not by my side. I feel like such a different person, like I'm not myself unless he's around. I haven't decided if that's a good thing or a bad thing, but I take delight in knowing that we must complement each other well. The other night he text me the sweetest thing about he couldn't wait to get home, so he could be a better husband to me...doing the dishes, cleaning the house, drawing me a bubble bath..just made my heart SO full. I've definitely learned to miss him, all over again, and I think this is the most I've ever missed him in my life.
Come the end of January, it will be Jeremy's turn to learn to miss me (not that he doesn't miss me while he's out on the road...but I mean, him being home and missing me:)... Bought my plane ticket the other day to fly out to California the end of January for 9 days. I am SO excited about this trip for many reasons...
#1 It will be my first trip w/o Jeremy since we've been married (minus a couple weekend getaways with my sister and mom)
#2 It will be my first time flying by myself...haha, not so scary since it's only a 45 minute flight!
#3 I will get to spend 9 days with my mom--I am SO looking forward to this...because my mom is amazing...
#4 I'll get to see some of my favorite people on this trip
#5 I'll get to go to two of my favorite places...the northern California coast and Ashland, Or.
and I'm sure there are many more..but it's going to be great..I'm flying into Reno where my parents will pick me up..and I'm sure we'll spend a couple of days there..then drive down to Redding and see my sister and Erich..maybe spend a night or two there..drive over to the Coast, see Jeff & Melani for a day or two..drive up the coast and cut over to Ashland...oh man, it's going to be amazing.. I'm already praying that the weather will cooperate for us taking a road trip :)
So anyway...guess I should get myself ready for work. loves you all.
loves-a.

10.24.10

2010-10-24T08:15:00.000-07:00

it's all rainy and windy outside....the rain is splattering against the windows and the wind is howling around my apartment. It's quite lovely, actually. This kind of weather makes me feel creative, like I could sit inside and make mix cd's all day long for my friends, and make great collages for the cases. My first thought this morning, though, when I looked out the windows (I love to watch the rain fall...) was "I wish Evan and Nancy could come over for dinner..." Guess I'm missing me some Persons this morning.
Been thinking about people in my life that I feel like I've never had as much time with as I wanted....
Evan and Nancy
Jordan and Bethany
Marty and Becky
Jeff and Melani
Mel and Tysen
Nina and Kenny
Jordan C.
those are the people back "home" that have really been on my mind & in my heart lately... It's just strange that all these people, I haven't spent much of life with (except for a couple of you :)... yet, I feel the biggest connection to them, more than any friends I've ever had. Maybe it's the whole "you always want what you can't have" thing.... well, regardless, I miss them and wish they could all come over for dinner tonight.
*on a side note*
today is the last day of the Master Cleanse for me! SO excited to be able to cook and eat again. I feel good though, I must say, better than my first time. Purposely, I did not weigh myself at the beginning, because I didn't want to base my success on how many lbs. I lost, but on how healthy I felt..and I feel good and like I lost a few lbs., which is great. I'm sure the combination of doing the cleanse and doing the 30 day shred every day has helped.... Would love to get back to how I felt 3 years ago, but I'm pretty happy with where I'm at right now.
*another side note*
went to a show at the Flying M last night..my friends are in a band called Mickey the Jump.... and they blow me away every time I see them...seriously, the passion and excitement that they play with is infectious. I'm so proud of them........such talent, such great sound, man....I hope they get to play music like this forever. Following them up at the show was Wye Oak. Incredible band from Baltimore...do yourself a favor and get one of their albums.
loves-a.

10.18.10

2010-10-18T10:17:00.000-07:00

4 months ago, Jeremy and I drove away from a place I called home for 25 years of my life, Redding. Through the north eastern corner of California, through the barren eastern Oregon, and finally landed in the Treasure Valley, Nampa, Idaho. It's been a good, strange, hard, joyful, tearful, inspiring 4 months to say the least.
2 months ago, I started a new job using my degree as a PSR worker (psychosocial rehabilitationist). This was a big step for me, as many of you know, I was a loyal worker at Sunset Market for the past 10 years it seems. It's been good, strange, hard, joyful, tearful, inspiring 2 months to say the least.
4 days ago, I started the Master Cleanse for the second time around. My caffeine withdrawal headache only lasted for Day 1, unlike last time till Day 3, maybe I'm not drinking as much coffee as I used to. The saltwater in the morning is still gross, but I drink it with ease, all at one, unlike last time.
3 days ago, I started the "30 day shred" dvd by Jillian from Biggest Loser. Man, it's so hard to stick with her for 20 minutes, especially, since I cannot recall the last time I worked out. But I'm excited to be in shape, to lose my pooch, and to look like a smokin' hot wife for Jeremy when he comes home in November.
Yesterday...I had a rough morning. Not sure if it's partly because of when you detox, you typically become more emotional.... but, I was "homesick" like crazy. All I wanted to do was go pick up my sister and drive up to see our Mom and Dad. It didn't help that Jeremy wasn't home to comfort me...and that was another part of it, I just wanted him to be home with me. This is the farthest I've lived from my family, and I think it finally hit me how much I missed being around them. After spending last weekend with them camping in the mountains, fishing at Eagle Lake, sitting around my parents house chit-chatting, I really really missed them. And I knew it was bound to hit me sooner or later..I just wasn't expecting it to leave me teary-eyed for most of the day.
Today...I'm going to practice crocheting, I'm determined to learn this craft! Go to the library and check out some new books. Work with 1 client this afternoon (wish it was more..but nobody called me back today to confirm appts! grrrr). Watch some silly tv shows with Kaysha tonight as we drink our yummy lemonade and laxative tea (ha!).
I love you all... God is so good, all the time.
xo-a.

10.17.10

2010-10-17T09:22:00.000-07:00

Been having some quiet time this morning, just me and my Jesus. . .
this song explains my heart right now.

"All my Devotion"-Kristene Mueller

Beautiful Man,
Beautiful God,
You're more than worth my time.
You're more than worth these longings of my heart
Left unfulfilled,
Just for a time.

Beautiful Man,
Beautiful God,
You're more than worth my time.
You're more than worth these longings of my heart
Left unfulfilled,
Just for a time.

And I know You don't come as easy as some,
But I will watch and pray,
I will watch and pray.

Beautiful Man,
Beautiful God,
You're more than worth my time.
You're more than worth these longings of my heart
Left unfulfilled,
Just for a time.

And I know You don't come as easy as some,
But I will watch and pray,
I will watch and pray.
And I know You don't come as easy as some,
But I will watch and pray,
I will watch and pray.

Take it all,
Take it all,
Just give me Jesus,
Just give me Jesus.

Take it all,
Take it all,
Just give me Jesus,
Just give me Jesus.

I don't want any other lovers,
I don't want any other lovers,
I don't want any other lovers,
I don't want any other lovers,
For all my devotion belongs to this Man,
All my devotion belongs to this Man,
All my devotion belongs to this Man,
All my devotion belongs to this Man.

And I know You don't come as easy as some,
But I will watch and pray,
I will watch and pray.

And I know You don't come as easy as some,
But I will watch and pray,
I will watch and pray.

(if you don't have this album..you should probably go buy it right now.)
loves-a.

10.16.10

2010-10-16T19:27:00.000-07:00

God is good beyond words......
that's it....
I could write a whole blog about just how good He is...
and how real He is
and how big He is
and how loving He is
and how gracious He is
but I'll just leave it at this..
God is good beyond words.

loves-a.

10.14.10

2010-10-14T11:05:00.000-07:00

What a day...
woke up to check our bank account to find that Jeremy's last check from work bounced. *sigh* ... I was stressed & worried in an instant...but then had to remind myself that those things are not of God...I'm feeling much better now...after some prayer and some reminders from some dear friends of mine....
in brighter news...
I start the Master Cleanse tomorrow (2nd time doing it!) and am excited about the whole process, as this time I have 2 friends, Chad and Kaysha, that are committing to the 10 day cleanse with me. I think this will make it easier on me--although, last time, I did have to test my strength and cook for Jeremy 2 out of my 10 days...silly me.
as part of a mental/spiritual cleanse....I've decided to sell my iPhone (for financial reasons too)... I've been thinking alot about how much time I waste on that silly phone...and all the silly apps that I use every day. That phone has just made me lazy I think. Sure, I'll miss being able to play Wordswithfriends...and some of the other silly games... and you wonder how I'll get to where I'm going without my Maps app? I plan on actually using real paper maps to navigate my way when I'm on trips!! What a crazy idea, eh? And then I won't be checking my face book all the time, or reading every email I get throughout the day as soon as I get it... I'm looking forward to just being able to actually be where I am, instead of having this little computer with me. Technology, is not all it's cracked up to be, in my opinion. I just want a phone that can call people, text, and maybe take pictures...do they even make those anymore??
anyway.... today is day 2 of being home with Jeremy officially out on tour..and I miss him terribly. I thought it might be easier, since we've done this twice before..but I think that since I love him even more than I did back then--that's why it's hard. But I'm blessed up here--surrounded by great people that make sure I'm not just sitting at home feeling sorry for myself.
oohh---forgot to mention that I was camping in California with my fam this weekend! We had SOOOOOO much fun, but I'll save that for another post, when I get the pictures.
loves-a.

10.03.10

2010-10-03T12:23:00.001-07:00

A list of things I want to accomplish in the next....3-6 months.

1) Master the art of making biscuits & pie crusts (i'm a cook, my friends, not a baker...)
*my mom and sister are amazing cooks & bakers, so I can be too, right?*

2) Master the art of either crocheting or knitting
*once again, my mom and sister are incredible at this..well crocheting atleast..so a part of me wants to knit, so then I can be the master knitter of the family.. :)*

3) Master the art of sewing, and being able to alter ugly, thrift store finds into sweet, one-of-a-kind outfits just for me.
*I grew up wearing, almost all, homemade clothes by my mom. Eventually I'd like to make my own clothes, pillows, curtains, all that stuff, so I can create the same kind of one of a kind clothes I had growing up*

4) Eat, drink, breathe organic.
*this is a challenge right now, financially, but I've learned that I have SO much I can cut out of my life to make room for buying organic....baby steps though, for now*

5) Make all my own cleaning products (used to do this..but have grown lazy over the past few months).
*seriously, all you really need is vinegar, baking soda, castile soap (which is not even a necessity), salt, lemons, and elbow grease*

6) Eat more vegetables, maybe just eat meat twice a week?
*Jeremy will hate this, I imagine*

7) When I do eat meat, it must be local, organic, free-range.
*Yet another thing that seems out of our budget, but after doing some research, this just makes sense*

8) Start buying all the "new" stuff I need, at thrift stores or discount stores, only.
*thrift storing is a favorite, forgotten past-time of mine and I can't wait to scout the Idaho stores*

9) Getting an old typewriter and actually typing my friends & family letters/cards (Yet another thing I used to do....back in the day).
*of course, I had to get rid of 2 awesome typewriters back in the day...now they have become trendy & expensive...but I bet I can find one for under $10*

10) Exercise atleast 3 but hopefully 5 days a week, and therefore, becoming "fit" Amy...losing that lovely "i've been married 3 years" weight.
*Thanks to Tori, I'm going to be working out to the "Biggest Loser" dvds...that Jillian lady really freaks me out but maybe she's what I need to scare me into making exercise a part of my everyday life*

Just a few things, friends.....sometimes I need to just write things out...and put it out there, for people to read..so check in on me...see how I'm doing. K thx bye.
xo-a.

10.02.10

2010-10-02T14:33:00.000-07:00

Yes yes, it has been a long time coming, my friends. I have not abandoned my blog...but instead, every time I sat down to write...my mind would be flooded with thoughts, dreams, ideas, lyrics, verses, etc...
you get the idea
The past 3 months have been a time of reflection for me. Moving to Idaho may have been the best thing I've done for my soul. I'm hardly working (which is + and a - ) and therefore, have hardly had any money to do things with.
So instead....
I've been sitting...
reading..
praying...
journaling..
spending time with like minded folks..
dreaming..
hanging with my love..
Living in Redding, working full-time, I never had this much time on my hands..to just sit and think. To dwell on all the possibilities God has for me. To dream---to truly dream, and to believe that God is breaking and shaping me each day, so that I'll be ready when those dreams come to fruition. I've become a more emotional being that ever before, finding joy and tears are quite often best friends. Living in Redding...I had some great people around me... but I didn't have anyone in my life there, pushing me towards who I'm destined to be. . . and I think up here, I've caught a taste of what it's like to be surrounded by people that are going to support you and push you, because they love you.
so...
where am I at now, you ask??
well....
-Jeremy leaves for tour on Monday for a month. . . *sigh*..I sigh because Jeremy has really only been here with me in Nampa for 2 out of the 4 months we've been here. . . so it's bittersweet to send him off again....but I'm grateful for the opportunity he's getting to play with Matt and actually get paid!
-We're going camping with my family next weekend in California (going to be an incredible weekend!)
-I'm going to do the Master Cleanse when I get back, with some friends this time, I'm a strong person and all, but it was SO hard doing it on my own.
-I'm going to start exercising at least 3 days a week.... I turn 29 next month (what the heck!?!) and I have to start taking better care of myself.
-I've been reading books like crazy these days.... books that are inspiring me to eat organic, make everything I can possibly make-instead of going to the grocery store, shop at 2nd hand stores for clothes, and overall be grateful for what I currently have, and stop wishing for things that I don't.
-Dreams are becoming an exciting occurrence for me... dreams of owning some land (for some reason it's always on the coast of California?) and having a "retreat" that tired souls can come to for a few days, a week, a month..or however long it takes to restore their souls..and of course, we'll have a huge garden, some chickens, maybe a cow, tons of flowers and herbs, a few barn cats, and a lazy dog sleeping all day long on the front porch.
-Dreams of living a simple life...without all this junk that gets in between me and God. All the noise that muffles His voice in my life.
-Dreams of not putting so much value in material things.
-I'm thinking about getting rid of my iPhone... it has become way more than a phone to me, and I hate that....I don't want to be dependent on a phone...or feel like anytime someone emails me or facebooks me, I have to go check it right then--regardless of what I'm doing or who I'm with.
-I'm thinking I'm going to stop dying my hair.... you think this may not be a big deal...but I've got quite a bunch of gray hairs that have appeared on my head in the past few years...but, I just want to embrace them, and be me. Gray hair and all. Is that true beauty? We'll see, I'm just at a point where I want to be as natural as I can....plus, we just don't have the money for it these days.
-I think I finally am feeling alive.
so that's it....
that's what's been happening in the past few months. Man..it feels good to write...I'm sure I'll be doing a lot of this once Jeremy is gone....even more time on my hands.
I love you all and hope each day you are being pushed closer towards who you are intended to be.
xo-a.

oh yea..p.s. to hear a bit of my heart the past few months, listen to this song...props to my brother, Christian for blogging about it (days ago...hint hint, Christian... ;)

7.7.2010

2010-07-07T11:12:00.000-07:00

so we've moved!
we're here in Nampa, Idaho and loving every minute of it!! Well, Jeremy is back in California finishing up a recording project but hopefully will be home soon! I've really decided that life is so much better when we're together. We have learned so much about marriage over the past six months..and it seems like God is molding and shaping us daily...I get excited thinking about the hard times, realizing that God's at work in our lives....it's really an incredible perspective to have....God's really been testing me to pour out His grace on people in my life..
some I have succeeded...
some I have not...
I've learned so much in the few weeks I've been up here...
about myself..
about people..
about lifestyles..
about impact..
about intentions..
about love..
about faith..
I think that's why i haven't been blogging..I've really been in a time of listening and reflecting. I feel truly blessed that I'm able to take this time off from working..and just recenter myself.... Figure out who I am, completely dependent on God...
it has been amazing.
.......
the group of friends I have up here already feel like long time friends.... even family I would say. Jeremy and I are so excited to live life with these people. Having Sunday dinners together every week, committing ourselves to being intentional......man, I love it. I feel like this is the kind of place I have been searching for all along.
loves-a.

2010-05-05T20:56:00.000-07:00

Dear Honda (aka Jacob),
I will miss you greatly. 7 years ago you and I became a pair..... you were only 63K deep....
I can't even remember all the trips we took...
the weather we drove in...
the music we played..
the passengers we hauled...
..
i do remember that one time we went 4-wheeling on accident...sorry about that.
i remember the first time I let Jeremy drive you, which was a big deal, I normally don't let people drive...
i remember when I ripped your side panel off, driving through the snow
i remember the time we got pulled over, well Jeremy was driving, late at night, but got out of a ticket
....
and now... 90K later, I say goodbye.
your new owner seems nice...
what more could an 18 year old boy want?
you'll be perfect for him.
you will be missed.
loves-a.

5.04.10

2010-05-04T09:54:00.000-07:00

I'm at a point in my life......
-that the people I surround myself with, I want to invest in their lives, and want to feel the same from them.
-that I don't care about your style, your beliefs, your status, I care about you, and want you to be yourself around me. NoliesNodrama.
-that I am content with sitting at home, reading a good book, instead of drinking the night away at the local watering hole.
-i don't want to waste time on fake friendships and surface relationships.
-i want deep, meaningful relationships.
-i want people that I can be myself around and not feel pressure to be someone else.

the other day I realized.....
-some friends never change, for the good or the bad.
-some friends you pick up with, right where you left off, even if you haven't seen each other in 6+ years.
-some friends inspire you to be a better person, without you even realizing it.
-some friends will always be your friend, regardless of the crap that's happened.
-some friends will never be your friend again, because of the crap that happened.

Really...
I'm a simple girl.
All I want.....
-to live every day in His presence
-to surround myself with love
-to always love
-to always impact positively
-to have genuine people in my life

it's crazy....
--for the last year or so, I haven't felt that here in Redding.
--but since we've decided we're moving, so many incredible people have came into my life.
-old friends and new friends-
--why now? why not last year, when I needed you the most?
--maybe to leave Redding on a good note?
--good memories?

regardless....
-I am happy that those old friendships have been rekindled...
----if we have survived 5 or 6 years with no contact, I know we can survive a 10 hour trip----
-I am blessed by the new friendships
----and plan on spending as much time with YOU before I leave.

I am....
-looking forward to this new chapter in my life.

loves-a.

5.02.10

2010-05-03T08:57:00.000-07:00

So it's official...
we are moving to Idaho on June 18th!
Nampa will be our new home....
and I absolutely cannot wait.
It's crazy to me that I've only been there 2 times...
yet, just after the first few days there, I knew I wanted to live there.
The people there are probably the most genuine & sincere people I've ever met.
They're the kind of people you'd want to take home to meet mom & dad.
They're the kind of people you'd want your kids to grow up with.
....
they're the kind of people I can't wait to live life with.
It is weird to me that we're actually doing it...that I'm actually going to move out of Redding!
Been a long time coming...
But I must say...we are not leaving Redding because we hate it here...
it's actually quite nice...
Just not for us, anymore.
....
things I'll miss about Redding:
1) my family is here (well close to here)
2) Whiskeytown lake
3) being 3 hours from the ocean
4) being able to see 2 beautiful mountains, well 3 if you count Balley
5) our house
......
is it strange that I can't think of much more? I know more will come to me..right now I'm more excited about Nampa.
of course I'll miss some of the people here...
but the new life beckons...
ah, adventure----- i can't wait.
loves-a.

4.30.10

2010-04-30T20:04:00.001-07:00

So in my quest to live a simpler, more natural life...I have decided to do two things: the master cleanse and start natural birth control.

The cleanse.... I think I'm going to start on Monday.. I have been researching it like crazy and feel like I know the ins and outs pretty well. I have already mentally and spiritually prepared myself for this time, and am actually pretty excited about the "results"....the hardest part will not necessarily be not eating, but not cooking instead. i LOVE to cook....so for 10 days, I'm going to hang up my apron... well, maybe not, I've read a few MC'ers, were able to cook a meal for their family around day 7, without any temptation....so we will see. So this weekend, I'm planning on making a few of my favorite meals: Nacho Spuds, Slow Cooker BBQ Pork Sandwiches, and BBQ Chicken & Potato Packets.... then the rest will be up to my darling husband. I tried desperately to convince him to do the cleanse with me....but guess I'm just not as convincing as I thought I was....Oh well, I do know that I am stubborn enough to do a cleanse by myself :) Pretty sure that in the last couple of weeks, I discovered I'm lactose intolerant... yep. Sucks. Man oh man...I love cheese and don't even get me started on ice cream *sniff sniff Ben&Jerrys*.....but realized the whole dairy thing just doesn't sit well with me... Make sense, since humans were not created to drink cow's milk, but breast milk from their mother.... So since it would be a little weird (and not to mention unheard of) to purchase breast milk, I've opted for Almond milk... and I love it.. So now the hardest part will be the cheese... I think I might first try goats & sheep milk cheeses and if that doesn't work...sigh, does that mean veggie cheese? I don't think I'm a huge fan but haven't really dabbled too much into the fake cheese.
anyway...
as far as the natural birth control, or natural family planning, it just makes sense...and really is the only option that I'm a fan of. I took birth control almost the first 2 years of being married, and suffered from extremely bad headaches...so bad that my doctor suggested I stop taking it because it could be causing blood clots in my brain. Really!??!?! And you prescribed me this in the first place??? Anymore, I'm just so over all the prescription drugs we get from doctors that are "helping" us, when in reality, they're really just pumping us full of chemicals that our bodies may have a reaction too.... anyway.... yes, we could use condoms for the rest of our lives, but really, c'mon people, who wants to do that. And no, I don't want to get an IUD...I have too many moral dilemmas about that to even consider it. So, "taking charge of your fertility" and "Honoring our cycles" now sit on my bedside table. Is this too much information? Well, you know me...and this is my blog after all, I didn't ask you to read it. ;)
I'm sure I'll be blogging more and more throughout my fast.... telling you all in depth about my eliminations... haha, but seriously, I might.
love you all.
-amy

04.29.10

2010-04-29T19:38:00.000-07:00

April....where did you go? sheesh. . . seems like just yesterday we were driving back from Idaho, wishing we never had to leave....and that was back in February! Maybe it's how busy we allow ourselves to get that makes time fly so fast...I can remember being a kid and feeling like the school year was soooo long. . . and then summer, oh summer. Summers when you're a kid, there's really nothing like it.
This is a good year. . . .
lots of changes happening.
At the age of 28, I finally feel like I am moving in the right direction towards the life that God has planned for me.
simple.
full of life.
full of meaning.
full of love.
full.

Reading this book right now..."Animal, Vegetable, Miracle," by Barbara Kingsolver...and it's changing my whole view on the way we live here on earth. Along with her family, Barbara made a commitment to only eat food grown locally...and by local, they meant within an hours drive from there house. And in doing this, they only ate what was available seasonally. Novel idea, eh? This family labored in the garden from March till October, knowing that the food they so meticulously cared for, would sustain them. Lily, the little 9 year old, raised chickens, so she could start a business of selling eggs.... Camille the eldest helped her mom can insane amounts of tomatoes.....
long story short...this book has really got me desiring to live a place that will allow me plenty of room to garden...and maybe even have a couple chickens? Just to be able to go to farmers market, and really establish a relationship with the fellow growers.... and really know where your meat is coming from. Yes yes, it is more expensive...now, but if enough people commit to eating locally, the prices will drop----true, it might not be until our unborn children are our age---but wouldn't you rather leave them with that future? .... so in the past week I have bought local eggs and local ground beef from Lazy 69 ranch here in Redding...well actually we just started selling both of them at my store...and yes, it was way more than I'm used to paying but it made me realize, I don't have to eat meat with every meal anyway.... in the long run, isn't my health more important anyway? Wouldn't I rather know that what I'm cooking hasn't been injected with hormones or antibiotics??
anyway....
I've been thinking about what to do with my life....now that I'm all done with school, I feel like I should go on and do something with my Psychology degree...so all that money isn't wasted. But now I'm thinking, how cool would it be to go back to school and get a degree in Sustainable Agriculture or something like that? I secretly wish I could work on an organic farm. . . and really hope to have one of my own someday. I think that would tie in rather nicely with my dream of owning a B&B.....oh think of the incredible meals I could create with food from my garden.... *sigh*
I feel more and more that I want to live as simple as possible..... there is so much I can go without. And I feel like this is a season in my life that is pivotal in how I'll live the rest of my life....So in addition to cooking at home 5 nights a week, I want to cook local food as much as possible. Another aspect of learning to live without, Jeremy and I are selling our Honda next week, making us a one car family---I can't wait, I've wanted this for a long time. I want to start canning, like my mom and grandma used to. I want to start making my own deodorant and laundry soap..not just because it' the "green" thing to do, but because it just makes sense.
Poor Jeremy, he's probably thinking I've turned into some crazy woman :)
loves-a.

4.4.10 Easter

2010-04-04T19:51:00.000-07:00

so Lent is over.
here's what I learned....
sacrifice is good and essential to my faith. I live a simple life, but a life full of luxury nonetheless. A life that gets so busy that I often find myself caught up in a whirlwind, forgetting my purpose here on earth.
Today I remembered.
Today I got to love on a friend of mine. Offer up encouragement and advice. Love. Listen as they bore their soul. Love.
I'm not sure what has happened with this little town that I live in...but I feel like so much evil has surfaced.....and it's all around me. I'm starting to feel like those new buds on the trees outside that just got hammered by the wind and the rain. Wondering when it's going to end...but it's not me that's hurting---it's those around me, getting hurt, hurting themselves. And my heart is just broken for them. So I guess I am hurting for those out there in the storm. Hardest part.....I don't feel like I am close enough to speak into their lives, or that even if I did, they wouldn't receive it how I mean it. . . . Ish. How do I explain it...... I'm not close to people here like I used to be, which saddens me, but it's so much easier to hear God when you're not caught up in the drama. I miss the community though. I miss having a church family that I can fit into. I miss having people to call when I'm bored.
Life is good nonetheless. God has been speaking to me about my future lately. And it's so wonderful to hear Him and see Him working in my life. It's so freaking exciting to see what the future holds. I'm in the Word every day again, which I'm eating up... it's incredible how stories I've read countless times, practically punch me in the face with a new understanding.
.............anyway.
Going up to Oregon for a few days with my mom this week. Grandpa isn't doing well...he's got a stomach full of cancer, with no option for operation. I have a feeling that it is going to be hard to see him....realizing it just might be my last. . . .
weird thing happened though the other morning... I hopped into the shower and was sudsing up...when all the sudden I was overcome with an urgency to pray for healing in my Grandpa. That God would cure the cancer....outta nowhere, I believed God could do it. Now don't get me wrong, I am a firm believer that God can heal the worst of the sicknesses in this world...but I've never been one that felt I had the authority to pray for it. that morning..I had it though. Not saying that my prayers will keep my Grandpa alive, because sometimes God has other plans, and one thing remains---His plans are always good. but....just feeling that, was a rush.
so I'm looking forward to that trip, going with my mom. Going to see my cousins and aunts and uncles, and my incredible Grandparents. I will forever remember being a little kid, laying away at night, listening to them pray for each and every one of their grandkids, every night. I need that kind of commitment in my life.
anyway....Happy Easter friends, quite a lonely one for me this year. Jeremy is with his family, I'm here. I roasted a duck. Making a mix for my trip. . . sigh...someday I will have a job where I don't have to work weekends..and especially holidays!
loves you all.-amy.

3.25.2010

2010-03-25T10:11:00.000-07:00

something I've been chewing on lately....

"Give what you have to anyone who asks you for it; and when things are taken away from you, don't try to get them back." -Luke 6:30

pretty sure we all could use that reminder, eh?

loves-a.

3.4.10

2010-03-04T17:46:00.000-08:00

since it's been a while.... figured you'd might have forgotten what I looked like. Here I am. A college graduate. Yep. Got my diploma to prove it. It's wonderfully strange not being in school anymore. I find myself sitting around in the morning, wondering what I should do with myself today. Clean house? Nope, did that yesterday. Laundry? Nope, folded and put away. Cook? Oh, that's right dinner is already in the crockpot...and some marinara sauce is bubbling away on the stove. And no, the marinara doesn't go with dinner tonight, I just decided to make some...well, because, why not? Made a batch of chocolate chip cookies today. Finished up two mix CD's for a couple lovely ladies today. Started going through magazines. . . ripping out pages. Need them for making collages. Collages for what you ask? Oh, who knows. I just feel like making something artsy. Blame it on Etsy. I've been pouncing every day for alteast an hour on that site.... wishing I was crafty and made crafty things.
Life looks quite different for me these days. My circle of friends has evolved. My daily routine is not so routine anymore. New roommates living in our lovely house. Time with Jeremy once again. The people I feel the most connected to, live 10 hours away. My heart is divided. Redding....oh Redding. I love you, but I do believe our time is quickly coming to an end. Dreaming about Idaho. Checking craigslist every day for houses and jobs. Wondering what life will be like up there. Missing ....people I've only spent 2 weeks of my life with, terribly. . . change ..... is on the horizon.
Lent seemed like an important thing for me to take part in this year....sacrifice & obedience.... something I can always work on in my life. Something my heart needs. Realignment for my soul. Facebook & alcohol. None of it. Not being on facebook has been strange. For the past couple of years, that's how we all connect. That's how we keep up with each others lives. And it's really got me thinking..... how sad it is that we know so much about a person just because of facebook...and that if we just met the person on the street, we probably wouldn't take the time to get to know them, because it'd take to long..it'd be inconvenient. But lurking at their page and pictures ..... that's different. I don't know.... it's just a strange time in history we're living in. . . And alcohol, well, I like detoxing from it anyway, for health reasons... it's weird how certain things are what you gravitate towards in social situations, or when dealing with certain emotions, or after having a long day. so.... so far, so good. I have till Easter...only a month away. Already, I'm learning so much about my heart....and how God sees it.
Music has made it's way back into my life.....well it's always been there, but I didn't have time to get crazy about it like I used to be. Ahhhh, feels so good to discover new music and make mixes for friends. Something in music just warms my soul. April is going to be incredible in the music realm. Jeremy and I are going to see Thom Yorke....and then the very next day, Jonsi. Lucky? for sure... Jealous? You should be.
Anyway....a little update for you..... if there are any of you readers out there anymore. Time to tend to dinner....and drink another cup of coffee---gotta stay up for the midnight showing of Alice in Wonderland!
loves-a.

onemoreday

2010-01-31T15:03:00.000-08:00

dear blog,
I know that I have been ignoring you. . . that you have been placed on the back burner in my life...but good news, I finish school tomorrow! ....this means I will have plenty of time to write to you. I have missed you and have great anticipation for our future.
loves-amy.

nineteen.days.

2009-12-13T21:35:00.000-08:00

nineteendays. till goodbye2009hello2010. strange.

I've had 2 blogs written...only to erase every word but the first line.
this is my main thought. . . in the fewest words possible.
why does this season seem so selfish. . .
so busy...
.. . .. ....... . .... .
i just want to be like Mary....
spend my time sitting at Jesus' feet.
..... .... .... ... ..........................

"my God, my all." -St. Francis of Assisi. . . the meditation prayer. ((how beautiful is that?))

tis the season...

2009-11-23T21:34:00.000-08:00

we're having an early Thanksgiving with my parents tomorrow, I can't wait....so excited I already set the table. Boy does that make me feel domestic, setting the table for one, and then setting it a day in advance! Should be great, my wonderful mom is cooking the whole meal and then bringing it down to our place....ah, I love getting together with family and eating yummy food. . .

this time of year is always a wake up call for me. a wake up call of how blessed I am, of how much I have to be thankful for, of the abundance in my life, of the lack of abundance in other's lives. . .
Last week, my sister and I went to Macy's because they were having this big one day sale. . . I looked for a while, picking up things, admiring their shiny newness. . . I'd even walk around, holding the new item closely to my chest, excited about owning a new _____. and then I'd walk around long enough to remember, I already have one of those, and it works just fine. I'd walk even further, running my hand over the lovely Analon cookware, and realize my Kirkland cookware from Grandma does the trick. I walked through the bedding department, my eyes lighting up at the new Style&Co. duvet cover for fall. It was beautiful and I just had to have it. I stood there and looked at it for a while. . . then this thought popped into my head....how often do you actually notice your duvet cover? Maybe when you walk into the room to put laundry away. . .or for those few moments after you crawl into bed before your head hits the pillow. (And honestly, when do you ever make your bed so it looks like the beds in Macy's?--Thanks but I'll save my 500bucks). With a sigh, I turned and walked toward the 20 minute long line to find my sister. . . we already have 2 duvet covers and 3 sets of sheets, I think we're good. Jill had found 3 things she couldn't live without and so I stood in line with her, listening to all the excited shoppers boast about their new purchases. the best line I heard...."I don't even need this grill pan, but it's 65% off, so I couldn't NOT buy it." Really lady? Think about what you just said. . . goodness, we are messed up. Don't even get me started about Black Friday....the whole idea of it makes me want to puke. that will be another blog to come.....
So I left Macy's with empty hands but a full heart....a full heart because God has provided for me in ways that some people dream of, and that is enough.

I'm still reading through Follow Me to Freedom...almost done, but here is a little tidbit that is my desire/dream for my life....

"When we pray for the hungry, let's remember to feed them. When we pray for the unborn, let's welcome single mothers and adopt abandoned children. When we give thanks for creation, let's plant a garden and buy locally grown fruits and veggies. When we remember the poor, let's reinvest our money in micro-lending programs. When we pray for peace, let's beat our swords into plowshares and turn military budgets into programs of social uplift. When we pray for an end to crime, let's visit those in prison. When we pray for lost souls, let's be gracious to the souls who've done us wrong."
-Follow Me to Freedom---Shane Claiborne&John Perkins

battles.

2009-11-13T19:24:00.000-08:00

I have this dream of living in community.
No, not a dream, a passion.
I know that God has called me to live in community and to be a leader in bringing people back to the heart of our purpose here on Earth. Frustration often gets the best of me as I see the challenges and road blocks that lay ahead of me, forgetting how powerful my God is---and that He has given me this dream, and He wants more than ever to see it come to fruition.
This world is so deceivingly beautiful...that I often forget how simple our lives really can be--and should be. I get so caught up in the success of my own life, in getting my degree, in my 40-hr a week job, in my role as a wife, that my visions, my dreams get clouded in selfishness. Right now, I sit down and think of starting a commune and Satan immediately brings up all the cons and tells me it'll never happen, there's too much against me, and instantly, I am defeated.
I have chosen to start believing that God has put this passion in my heart for a reason.... even if it ends up looking differently that it does to me right now--I have to trust that He is making the path for me, that He is guiding my life, that He is good and faithful. While wrestling with these dreams of mine and reality, I've found myself attacked in so many different ways spiritually, emotionally, mentally, physically, Satan is tricky that way....which means I must be on the right path, cuz it's pissing Satan off. So I keep my head up, knowing my destiny is for greatness. That God has called me to serve and to live among the least and dammit, I'm going to do it.
Today my boss Kyall and I had this conversation that just really rocked me. We were talking about our lives, our passions, our struggles, our battles....I had told him one of my biggest frustrations with my life right now is that I don't feel I'm living up to the level I could be---that I've kind of plateaued. and that I have so much creative passion for people that is just being wasted away...he asked me what my passions were and before I could get a word out, he said, "you've got Acts 2:42-47 all over you...." oh man, this is my heart. This is what I want. This is what I want my life to be....

"All the believers devoted themselves to the apostles' teachings, and to fellowship,, and to sharing in meals (including the Lord's supper) and to prayer. A deep sense of awe came over them all, and the apostles performed many miraculous signs and wonders. And all the believers met together in one place and shared everything they had. They sold their property and possessions and shared the money with those in need. They worshiped together at the Temple each day, met in homes for the Lord's supper, and shared their meals with great joy and generosity--all the while praising God and enjoying the goodwill of all the people. And each day the Lord added to their fellowship those who were being saved."

We're really messed up as a world. Our priorities are all wrong. Our lives are full of success that doesn't mean anything in the end. Our families are inconveniences. Our jobs consume most of our lives. Our material possessions cause us to be in debt for years. Our pursuit of knowledge brings us to a title. Our mindset tells us to leave our spouses if it's not working, because that young guy/girl at work will make us happier. Our success defines us, and ends up owning us. But what does it all mean?? it's all meaningless, in the end. There is this battle going on inside of me right now. My heart, my spirit, my soul..... they're up against all the thoughts, definitions, goals that the world has put in my head.
"to have more, desire less......."
loves-a.

11.10.2009

2009-11-10T08:01:00.000-08:00

been chewing on this for the past couple days.....

"there is another gospel out there. it is a self-centered, blessing-obsessed gospel of prosperity. Become a better you. Find your best life. If we are not careful, in all of our infatuation with ourselves we lose the secret of Jesus: 'If you want to find your life, you've got to give it away.' Lose yourself. We're designed to live for something bigger than ourselves. When we spend so much time looking in the mirror, we are no longer looking at Jesus.
That's exactly what discipleship is all about, surrounding ourselves with folks who remind us of Jesus, and hoping they rub off on us a little. As one of my friends say, 'Discipleship means finding a Rabbi we follow so closely that we get covered in the dust behind him.' Intentional community is just choosing a group of folks to do life with because they will move us closer to the person God wants us to be.
That is one of the key ways we discern God's will, by asking, 'Does this--this community, this spouse, this leader--move me closer to Jesus?' Can I smell the fragrance of Christ on them?"

Follow me to Freedom--Shane Claiborne & John M. Perkins

times of old.

2009-11-05T20:56:00.001-08:00

this past week I worked on cleaning out my closets...going through boxes that I'd just moved over the past 3 moves, not really knowing what was inside....but this week, I was determined to clean, get rid of things that had no use in my life anymore....
I realized something, memories, whether good or bad, will always have a use in my life. They make me remember where I came from, what I've been through, who held my hand along the way, who's hand I wanted to hold, what guy I had a crush on, what guy broke my heart, where I wanted to go, where I actually went.... they add up to me. simply that.
it was good to reminisce. to find old letters from dear friends I'd forgotten about. to find old journals telling of fun times down in Chico. to find pictures of all the shows I've been too. to find old books that I can still remember lines from that impacted me. this past week 2 friends from my past messaged me on facebook.....and it was so wonderful to hear from them. Steve and Alicia, I have missed your words in my life.
times have changed since then. I have changed. and I hope for the best. I was thinking about that today while driving down Cypress..... I wonder what people think of me. I hope that they feel the love that's in my heart. I hope they see the good in me that I know God has put in me. I hope that they don't think I'm selfish or close-minded. I just hope they know I want to be known as someone that loves and someone that serves.
love and serve.
that's the call on my life.
loves-a.

i lost myself along the way

2009-10-29T20:38:00.001-07:00

*disclaimer* these are my thoughts, feelings, ideas. they are not yours, so keep that in mind. I write to write, to get my thoughts down, not to get comments or to stir up arguments. thank you*

So I haven't blogged in a while. I haven't done much in a while. Seems this past year has really flown by. . . full of work and school, with a little bit of fun in between. This is by no means a "pity post" but simply a "this-is-where-I'm-at-post".
Work has been stressful and trying 75% of the time and wonderful and exciting 25% of the time. But I try to remind myself how blessed I am to have this job, regardless of how I feel about it. God has provided a means for me to survive, to pay bills, to put food on the table, to pay for internet--- so the least I can do is be thankful.
School has been...school. I feel like I don't give it the time I really should, even though I pretty much am doing school related stuff online 6 out of 7 days a week. It'll be 2 years this February that I've been doing the online school (and working full time)....it has been a challenge---but well worth it, I'll have my bachelors in February--so then I can decide what I want to do with my life after all...
the combination of working full time and going to school has been really wearing on my soul lately. I feel like I've got lost along the way. I feel like I've forgot how to have fun because I don't have much time for it anymore. I feel like I don't have friends in my life like I used to, because I don't have time to pour into those friendships anymore. I feel like my best friends are my husband, my sister, and my mom (and I am o.k. with that f.y.i.) .... but it just weird for me, since I used to be quite the social butterfly. Maybe I am beginning the nesting phase of my life, where I am content to be at my own home with a good book and a cup of coffee, or sitting around the table eating yummy food with the people most important to me. I don't know what it is...maybe I'm just getting older and now it's harder to relate to all the youngins' in my life.
i miss having a church family, but when i started thinking about it, I haven't had a church family in the past year or so. While I was going to church, I didn't feel like I was part of it, or that I had a place there . . and i felt that was confirmed when after 3 months of absence this summer, no one had called me or checked to see how I was doing or what was going on in my life. but all that to say... this has been a good season for me to sit back and just hang out with Jesus and remember what is important about my relationship with Him, and how sometimes that gets clouded by all the lights and music and ambiance and agendas that exist in the church. I'm reading Shane Claiborne's newest book "follow me to freedom" right now, and it's really created a longing for a leader in my life. I am an independent person and know that I can take care of myself, and know that I have always had a strong relationship with Jesus and a desire to serve Him in every part of my life (and I'll always have that)....but sometimes I have questions, I have ideas, I have worries, I have doubts....and right now, i don't have anybody to ask, to share, to question. So I have just simply been getting in the word, which I know is the best place for me to be anyway, but I just miss that banter back and forth between two people.
I am ready to move. simple as that. the hardest part for me will be moving away from my family, but God has already began to cut my ties to Redding I think. I don't have the connection here like I used to, it has been a great place for me, and served it's purpose well, but I feel like if I stay here much longer, I will be living a mediocre life, never challenging myself, never trying out new things, never reaching for a new dream (or an old one), never getting out of the bubble. I've tried for quite a while this past year to feel the excitement that Redding has for so many people, and the passion that draws people here from all over the world, but it's just not for me anymore. This is just what I'm feeling right now. . . amongst other things. I'll be 28 in a little under a month and feel like I'm having to find myself again, figure out if who I am...is really who I am. Figure out where I am finding my identity because right now, I'm not feeling it. I feel like I'm almost be stifled, like my creative side, my passionate side, my vibrant side..... they're all just bubbling away on the stove, in a giant soup pot, with the lid sitting tightly on top.
I need to start making time for myself again. Time for me and Jesus. I don't get very much of that these days, and I can feel myself starting to freak out because I don't know where I went. I need to recharge....renew. I think this next year is going to be full of change. . . and I LOVE that thought.
loves-a.

06.07.09 x 2

2009-06-07T20:49:00.000-07:00

I have this dream of owning a bed and breakfast someday. and I hope it's a God-dream and not just an Amy dream. I know that He gives us passions in our lives but sometimes we find things to be passionate about that are not what He has intended......
anyway, tonight I was making some cookies and I felt this tug at my heart.... I am supposed to do this. Someday. God has placed compassion so heavily on my heart. He has put the desire in my heart to be a servant to all, not just my friends, not just my family. What better way than to have a B&B. . .imagine the people that I would get to serve.
But then I started thinking.... maybe a B&B is too much, maybe a hostel. I want to have a place that people don't have to use their credit cards to stay there. I want to have a big dining table that Jeremy and I and all of our guests can eat around.
drink wine.
break bread.
play cards.
live.
and I want to have a garden. a big garden. and fruit trees. and I want to be able to cook delicious meals and treats from the harvest. And I want to bless people with the abundance we are given. More than anything else.
While I was mixing up the cookies. .. . . God spoke to me about so many things...I think I should make cookies more often.....
so I have this old, wooden spoon that my mom gave to me when I was 19 and moved out on my own, since I had no cooking utensils, and she told me that every woman needs a good, wood spoon. So this is my favorite spoon, ever. One time my mom accidentally set it down on the hot burner and it charred the end of the spoon....so there is a chunk missing at the end. I think it gives the spoon character. . . Anyway, this spoon got me thinking about our society and how people don't take the time to mix things by hand anymore.
We have Kitchen Aid's to do that.
We have food processors to chop and blend our ingredients.
We have microwave ovens to heat our leftovers.
We have dishwashers to do our dishes.
I wish we would just slow down.
Take the time to get to know this life we are living. In my abnormal psychology class we've been discussing ADHD and how children are raised nowadays and how different it is than when we were kids. Kids used to play out in the streets till dark and parents didn't worry. Neighbors used to know each other well enough to go over and borrow a cup of sugar. People waved at you when you drove by. Nobody does that anymore. But everybody want to have a community that looks like this...but they are too scared, too lazy, too uncommitted. People just expect that somebody else will do all the hard work and they can join in whenever it's convenient for them. I got to share this with a coworker the other day. It was great, she was telling me how she'd overdrawn her bank account and we didn't get paid for another week. So I asked her how much she needed, and I knew Jeremy and I had enough, so I just wrote her a check. Simple. And she was blown away. Why wouldn't I do that? So it was just wonderful to be able to share my heart with her. . because now we have this bond, this understanding.
So moral of the story is.... God invented chocolate chip cookies. He can speak to us at the most unexpected moments. He can use things like old, wooden spoons to clear our vision. Amazing.

loves-a.

6.07.09

2009-06-07T17:36:00.000-07:00

sometimes, I just like to write lists.
no commitments.
no plot.
just lists.

1) went to Juan and Julie's wedding last night down in Durham at this place... Gale vineyards, the wine wasn't spectacular, but the night was incredible.
2) Dancing. it doesn't matter if you have good moves or how good you look, just get out on the floor. such a release for me.
3) I can't wait for the new BEP record to come out. don't judge me, you know you secretly like them too.
4) I have an amazing life, although I feel it is so busy these days----it is incredible that I get to live this life and that I have these many options to choose from.
5) My husband is hilarious when he drinks a bit too much wine. He talked the whole way home from Durham last night-I barely got 2 words in....hilarious.
6) This 80 degree weather is my favorite, by far.
7) This time next week, I will be on vacation.......amazing.
8) I am addicted to craigslist, I seriously look at it at least 3 times a day, and all different cities across the world, dreaming about places to live.
9) I will be really sad whenever it comes time to move out of this house, I love it here. so cozy, so homey, so..... wonderful.
10) two of my favorite people, Nancy and Evan, are moving to Boston this summer, and I couldn't be more excited for them but I like to be a bit selfish too, because I'm really going to miss them.
11) I think I'll make chocolate chip cookies tonight for the boys.... okay, and I'll most likely have a couple for myself...... :)

loves you all. -a.

6.3.09

2009-06-03T07:57:00.000-07:00

So sorry for the silence. Facebook has sucked me in, but apparently writing "notes" is not the same as writing "blogs"... so here I am.

Yesterday, Jeremy and I celebrated 2 years of marriage! Crazy how fast the time goes, I know everyone says that, but really, it's amazing.

Here are my thoughts on marriage.... after 2 years:

1) It's so important that you marry your best friend, because the romantic feelings aren't enough sometimes.

2) You must support each other in every way----spiritually, mentally, emotionally, physically.... it's all necessary.

3) Empower each other, daily, through words of encouragement, inspiring smiles, knowing glances....

4) It is important to keep selfishness out of your marriage, BUT each person must make time for themselves, and not feel bad for it (something I continually am working on...)

5) The small things you fight over are just that, small things, and really aren't worth the fight.

6) Have sex as much as possible.... sex really brings an intimate level that nothing else can... which is why God created sex, for marriage, to bring 2 humans to a whole different level of intimacy.

7) As a married couple, give as much as possible, to your friends and family, because living in God's will as a married couple---there is nothing like it.

8) Tell each other how much you love them-always, and why, and don't use the same reason every time.

9) Give each other passionate kisses often, just to let each other know the flame is still burning.

10) Don't try to change the other person, they are who they are, and you married them for that, so why would you want them to be any different?

ok, that's it for now... I need to get ready for work... was hard getting out of bed this morning, Jeremy got me one of those memory foam thingys to put on our bed-SOOO comfortable. and for him, I am getting Wilco tickets this Friday!! Can't wait!. Jeremy is amazing, my best friend, the love of my life, I feel SO blessed to have such an incredible person to share this life with. I love you babe!

4.19.2009

2009-04-19T22:27:00.000-07:00

listening to Kristene Mueller all night.
she messes me up.
God speaks through her music so clearly to me.
it's like the words she wrote, were meant for me, just me, to hear.

one line in particular... it kills me....
"I don't want any other lover...."
"all my devotion belongs to the Lord..."
it's tough to say that.
it's this weird struggle I always find myself in.
all these longings, all these needs, all these desires.
i'm constantly looking to Jeremy to fill them all.
I don't want any other lover---I just want Jeremy.
but then I remember....
what I am here for.
who my devotion belongs to.
so it kills me everytime....
tears, everytime.
it's so my desire to live like God is all that matters to me...
but I just can't.
and maybe that's not what He intends?
as a wife, Jeremy is up there, right after God...
and so often it seems like the line blurs....

"take it all.... just give me Jesus..."
can I live that?
can I say that?
hold true when God takes away?
believe His love is sufficient?

whew..
heavy thoughts.
i'm not bumming out. . .
just getting out some words.

loves-a.

4.17.09

2009-04-17T20:35:00.000-07:00

i guess i might be back to writing.
my days have been so full, i feel like i owe it to myself to sit down and write.
such a good release sometimes.
seems like the days just get busier and busier. . .
I'm not a huge fan of that.
working alot.
writing and reading tons for school.
still trying to unpack and organize our house.
seems like any spare moment I have. . .
I just want to sit.
in silence.
i feel so boring these days.
lack of spontaneity.
lack of creativity.
lack of. . .
i don't know.
i hate feeling mediocre.
like I'm just going through the motions.
i want to feel like I'm living on purpose.
i want to live with purpose.
with passion.
right now all i do....
wake up at 6:30...
make a double espresso...
do homework till 8...
get ready for work..
work from 9:30-6. .
(work has been alot these days too...I'm exhausted at the end of the day).
get home...
cook dinner.
do some more homework..
do some laundry.
shower.
go to bed.
blah blah blah.

it's just a phase. i know. I'm just so over it.

God and I have been having some great conversations though lately. . . which is incredible.
this morning started out in serious bummerville for me.
i was feeling all stressed...mad at Jeremy b/c they were loud boys in the hot tub till 1 in the morning. cranky because I slept all of 4 hours. feeling like I don't have any time. feeling like I'm not cutting it. then those feelings turned into anger that I'm having to do it all. that I'm the only one that cares...oh serious pity party, let me tell you.
then it hit me. how the hell is my husband, my family, my friends supposed to fill the needs that only God can fill in my life. this is what happens when i screw up my priorities and get selfish with my life. others let me down because i put expectations on them. sucks. big time. so i put on John Marc McMillan this morning on my way to work because I was not going to have a crappy day. . . blared "how He loves" probably 3 times on repeat. . i sat in my car till the very last minute I had to go clock in, singing at the top of my lungs, eyes full to the brim with tears. . . "Oh how He loves us, Oh how He loves....So we are His portion and He is our pride, drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes, if grace is an ocean we're all sinking.....so heaven meets earth like a sloppy wet kiss and my heart turns violently inside my chest...i don't have time to maintain these regrets these regrets when i think about the way....He loves us....."
those words kept me going through a crazy day at work. His strength was what sustained me today. i am drained. physically. emotionally. mentally. but joy prevails. I have so many reasons to be thankful. . . so many reasons to smile.....
"How blessed we are, for crying now, that we will laugh someday at how.... blessed we are," -Mineral.

04.16.09

2009-04-16T23:34:00.000-07:00

i'm thinking about blogging again.
thought the blog world might want to know.
loves-a.

long time...

2009-02-19T23:25:00.001-08:00

hey friends......sorry for the absence... but i'm moved to Facebook. and i'm not into doing more than one social network at a time..takes up too much of my time... so if you're on facebook, find me. we can be friends. if not..... sadness.
loves you all....
-amy

1.15.2009

2009-01-15T17:52:00.000-08:00

jealousy.
I have it.
my sister just came by.
with her new ride.
her and erich bought a......
2003 Toyota Tundra.
all black.
murdered out as Jill puts it.
jealous.
not many of you know this about me
but i'm a truck girl.
not just any truck.
it's gotta be toyota.
this baby has got huge tires.
a 3 inch lift...
i have to use the oh sh*t handles to get in.
love it.
went for a quick drive
(jill drove of course, i'll wait to ask for a drive.........
till, tomorrow).
came home to my 97 Corolla and 98 Honda.
at the humble life of driving sedans.
Ok, enough of me being jealous.
...or atleast blogging about it.
they totally deserve this truck.
................
maybe I'll ask her to put me in their will...
for the truck.

1.11.2009

2009-01-11T14:40:00.000-08:00

a few things I've decided:

1) I'm not fancy, so I should stop trying on fancy clothes. just not me.
2) I love wearing a t-shirt and jeans, I am that girl.
3) I'm really into high tops right now.

Jeremy and i went out to the vans outlet today. got some sweet kicks.
I've tried on fancy shoes, slouchy boots, trendy ballet flats..just can't do it. guess it's the tomboy in me. I've tried all the new styles of shirts on; but always resort back to a v-neck or plain white t. I've tried on cropped jackets, stylish trench coats, and dressy pea coats; but I'd rather wear a hoodie w/a blazer. i always admire (kinda jealously) the stylish girls I know, wishing I could dress like them, but well, I'm okay that I don't because it's just not me, and I like who I am.

Funny how you continue to deal with self-image issues no matter what age you are.

1.10.2009

2009-01-10T18:45:00.000-08:00

so Jill and I were shopping at WinCo this afternoon (which was INsane for some reason) and we were walking down an aisle when Jill pointed this out. . . um, gross! Seriously, a whole chicken in a can. already cooked. no need to refrigerate. does that gross you out? seriously people. i don't even know what to say.

Jeremy and I met up with our friends Kayla and Marcus at the Downtown Eatery last night (I love that place). It was a great night, we had incredible conversation with those two. We have the pleasure of shooting their wedding this April, I'm super excited-I think it's going to be a super fun wedding, because well, Kayla and Marcus are super fun. Kayla and I have been friends for.... what 12 years or so? (whaddaya think Kayla-since I know you're reading my blog, you little blog stalker! :) I absolutely love picking up the pieces of old friendships like nothing has changed.

anyways, that's all for tonight.
loves you all.
-a.

p.s. how amazing was the weather today? seriously-i wore flipflops, jeans, and a t-shirt. amazing.

1.08.2009

2009-01-08T18:15:00.000-08:00

two things I love right now:
1) my new flatiron. seriously. i love my hair right now.
2) my new striped sweater. i love target.
(okay-i guess that was 4 things...)

two things I hate right now:
1) my slightly congested head. i hate feeling the sickness begin.
2) my honey isn't here. late late tonight I'll see him. *cheers*

school started up again for me this week. and man on man am I having a hard time getting back into the groove. 1 more year. I can do it.
i've been thinking I want to join a gym again. sick of the married weight I've put on over the last year and a half. but do I really want to pay 20 bucks a month when I could just get my lazy ass in gear and go running. think i'll go buy some new workout pants (since I only have shorts and it's freezing outside) and hopefully that'll inspire me. I love walking downtown where we live, so why wouldn't I love running around here. plus, since I'd be seeing people all the time-I'd have to run the whole time...when I used to "run" alot, I would walk for a while until I saw someone, and then I'd start running again so they wouldn't think I was lame...totally a mental thing. . .
took an hour nap today when I got home from work...so so nice. i love love naps.
well i'm going to heat up some leftovers for dinner... eat a piece of cake that Jeremy brought home for me last night..and watch the new Grey's Anatomy. How lame that the Office is a rerun tonight. seriously.
loves you all.
-a.

1.6.2009

2009-01-06T17:35:00.000-08:00

my parents just dropped by for a few.
made them triple americanos.
was baking chocolate chip cookies too.
my dad says...
"amy, you're so efficient in the kitchen.."
:)
such a funny little complement
but man-oh-man did it make me smile.
i love that feeling you get when you realize...
someone close to you is proud of you.

'twas a beautiful day today...
i love redding in the 60's.
ah..........
should've gone for a walk.

it's weird with Jeremy being back to "work"..
i've gotten used to him being home all the time..
wishing for some quiet, amy time..
now I can't wait for him to come home.
goodness, i love him like-whoa.

ok kids.
time to get ready for dinner.
heading over to the Harrison's.
2 of my favorite people, ever.
taking cookies and limoncello.
kelly's making lasagna.
oh snap.
this will be a good night.

love to you all.

1.5.2009

2009-01-05T16:00:00.000-08:00

yea.
i just made homemade butter.
just call me betty crocker.
i feel pretty darn domestic right now.
been listening to the new
kanye all day.
anyone want to dance with me?
'cos that's what i've been doing all afternoon.
just call me the bumpin' bad ass butter maker.

i'll leave it at that.
feeling a little silly at the moment.
silly enough to go to WinCo?...hhmm.
it IS the 5th of the month.
ugh.
oh Trader Joes, when will you come?
....
making Coconut Chicken Curry tonight.
((((((((yum))))))))
it's one of my favorite things to make...
and to eat.
loves you all.
-a.

1.4.2009

2009-01-04T19:45:00.000-08:00

geez.. I haven't blogged in forever. Guess nobody missed me though, eh? sheesh.........
so... 2009. crazy.
it's been a good year so far. really good.
went up to Ashland with Nancy and Evan this weekend.
dinner at the Standing Stone.
drinks at the Black Sheep and the Siskyou Pub.
snow falling on the streets.
cozy sleeping at the Plaza.
oh how I love Ashland.
especially with friends.
jeremy got some great pictures of us being ridiculous..
maybe he'll post them someday.
i bought 2 exciting things today.
a new down alternative comforter for Jeremy and I
and the new Kanye West album(808&Heartbreak) for me.
don't judge me. i love it.
i'm watching food network right now...
getting inspired to cook again,
i can't wait to have a dining table that we can actually sit around.
i love our place here but that's my one bummer
a lack of kitchen space.
someday.
. . . .
ok.
i promise that i'll blog more in the days to come.
loves you all.
-a.

12.07.08

2008-12-07T11:01:00.000-08:00

100th post. oooh, i should celebrate.
Sigur Ros is on the stereo-totally fitting..
Ara Batur
wrecks me every time.

first day back to work after 10 days off. ugh.
can't I just stay at home and get paid.....:)
time for a little nap
sleep was minimal last night
and the fogginess is just begging me to nap.
then I'll brew a french press
make some chocolate chip cookies
go grocery shopping
and off to church.

saw an old drunk man get tackled by RPD at the Squire Room last night
what a weird thing to see.

i'm trying to get into the Word every day again . . . here's what hit me this a.m............

Pursue peace with all people, and holiness, without which no one will see the Lord…Hebrews 12:14

word.
loves-a.

12.6.08

2008-12-06T09:29:00.000-08:00

okay, I'm ready for Christmas now... Last night helped me get more in the holiday cheer. We went down to the Christmas tree lighting with some friends, went to the Downtown Eatery for some warmth and cheer...and then watched A Christmas Story back at our place. a great night with great friends.
it's crazy all the talk going on about gift giving this Christmas. And my biggest desire is that people would feel this way all year long. Stop spending ridiculous amounts of money going out for coffee with friends every day, instead, invite them into your home and brew a pot of coffee. Do the the math yourself. How much do you spend on coffee when you go out... versus a 1lb bag of coffee? I think I read somewhere once that a bag of coffee yields 45 8 oz. cups of coffee. hhmm,..... I'm not trying to make you feel like crap, just trying to make you think. And think of how much money you spent on that new Rob Bell book just because you had to have it now, and you couldn't wait to borrow it from someone or check it out form the library (I'm totally talking to myself here)........... it's just crazy how much we spend spend spend because we have to have it.......NOW. ugh. Its bittersweet for me whenever I get rolling on this because it seems like it's such a big thing to tackle and that it's never going to change...but I just have to remember the influence I can have on people just by living my life the way God has called me to. And living with the posture of worship every day----with all that it entails. So I agree with the Advent Conspiracy in what they're about..
[Worship Fully]
[Spend Less]
[Give More]
[Love All]
but can't we do this all year? isn't that we're about? i urge you to start praying more for this to become your lifestyle, not just a trend you latch onto for one month out of the year. . . .
okay, I'll get off my soapbox now.
and don't get me wrong-if you're one of the ones that Advent Conspiracy made you feel like crap on how much we spend and that you're going to change your spending habits this Christmas...because that's awesome, but don't do it out of guilt-do it out of the love and honor that God has called us to live out here on earth. And don't do it just this month....
loves-a.

12.05.08

2008-12-05T13:48:00.000-08:00

2nd Thanksgiving was incredible. Even better than our first Thanksgiving this year! The turkey turned out SO moist and tasty, the stuffing was a hit, and the mulled wine was sweet and delish. All the food people brought was delicious actually. We had TONS of dessert to feast upon. Great time sitting around with friends. Thanks to Jonesy for letting us use the house-it was awesome. If I ever owned a house that big, I'd always have people over for dinner-actually they could live there too! :) it'd be way too lonely with just Jeremy and I! What a way to finish up our life group for the year, I'm SO thankful for all of the new friendships I've made-and for deepening the other ones. So now that I know I can cook a turkey-I'm stoked, I'm ready to tackle anything in the kitchen! Kristena was telling me I should host a cooking club/life group this next year..hhmm, might be something to think about. . . .
it's a beautiful day out...wonder if it is ever going to rain. I love this weather..but i'm having a hard time getting into the holiday spirit without the cold, rainy weather. This year is going to be very simple for Team Coverdale, and I'm super stoked about that. Yea, it's nice to get presents and give them too-but it's totally unnecessary. We have enough.
so I went to the dermatologist a few weeks ago... because ever since I've been off birth control my skin has got pretty crappy (and no, just because I'm not on birth control, Jeremy and I are not trying to get pregnant-let me stifle that rumor before it starts! :) . . . I got super frustrated/and still am at the appt. I just wish SO bad that health insurance would cover me going to a holistic doctor. Just someone that actually wants to cure my skin problem internally in a healthy way. Not give me 2 antibiotics and a topical cream that warns you of all these side affects and harm that could be caused to the baby if we were to get pregnant. ugh. I'm trying so hard to be healthy with what I put in my body and I have never been one for antibiotics because I know how bad they are for your body and how susceptible they leave you to catch anything. I've done a few cleanses that have helped but I think I'm really going to get serious about curing my skin problems in an all-natural way. The medicine the doc put me on has caused my neck and eyes to get red patches that itch and burn...lame. I'm over it. Just sucks that I dropped 200 bucks almost to go see a guy that really didn't care about me, but just about giving me a prescription. So I've been reading up on earth clinic and reading a book on sugar about all these things I can do to better myself. I'm excited about it..Jeremy probably not so much:) He hates it when I go on these crazy healthy phases..but I'm really going to try to make this my lifestyle-not just a phase. I'm pretty sure this means giving up beer and alcohol which ultimately is not a big deal I guess. I'll just have my healthy, one cup of red wine when I feel the need to indulge:)
anyway..whew. that was probably a gigantic paragraph that you really didn't care about reading..but that's what's going on in my life...and really the only frustrating thing in my life right now..
we're heading down to the Christmas tree lighting with Jonsey and Shelbs and maybe the Harrison's tonight-will be wonderful. Some of my most favorite people. anyway..loves you all-a......

12.04.08

2008-12-04T10:59:00.000-08:00

Happy 2nd Thanksgiving!!
Just got my turkey on the BBQ about an hour ago... my first ever turkey. Kind of exciting. Quite the experience trying to handle a 23lb. bird. My sis came over and helped me with the awkwardness. Got the neck and the giblets out no problem... the dang bird barely fit in my roasting pan.... anyway, just got some old fashioned gingerbread put in the oven, our house will be smelling lovely in a bit. And no, not gingerbread cookies-actual gingerbread. dElish. Next will be the Sourdough Stuffing with Pear and Turkey Sausage...yum. it's my mom's recipe and SO good. I'm not a stuffing in the turkey kinda girl-gets a little to mushy for my liking...so hopefully everyone else won't mind:).... Then I'll get the gluewhein going..what's gluewhein you ask? A delicious warm, spicy, mulled wine pretty much. I'm pretty excited about tonight. Going to be great sitting around with friends, filling our bellies, laughing, playing games.. I can't wait.
So Jeremy and I got a new ride.... pretty sweet. Affordable. WAY nicer than the Jeep....
This is what we wanted to get.....

pretty sweet, eh?....

but we got a 1997 Toyota Corolla instead. Bought it from my parents. Not exactly what we wanted but exactly what we needed. it's kinda weird driving it b/c it was the car I drove when I first got my license before I got my 1971 VW. Brings back good memories. Jeremy is installing some speakers right now-the other ones...not so good..And my wonderful musician of a husband would not have it. . . anyway-God totally blessed us with this. I really feel like He's been blessing us in a ton of ways lately. It's incredible.
well friends... must go tend to my baking/cooking. Hope all is well. Don't forget about the Christmas Tree Lighting on Friday night and the parade on Saturday. Team Coverdale will be there.. ah-the beauty of living Downtown, no more fighting the crowds parking. beautiful.
loves-a.

12.01.08

2008-12-01T20:18:00.000-08:00

i know i know..it's been a few days since I blogged... i've been on vacation. sorry... this is going to be quick though.

i discovered the most painful thing ever (well, I heard childbirth is pretty painful..but i've yet to experience that..)...try hot bacon grease in your eye. oh yes. it happened to me this morning. popped right into my open eyeball. damn that bacon. so good it hurts.
spent almost 8 hours today clearing brush, cutting down trees, building a HUGE bon fire, raking, scooping... all on a massive hillside of one of my parent's friends. single mom, with no help keeping up her acres of high desert hillside. the aching shoulders and back...totally worth it. I just don't know if i'll be able to lift my shoulders high enough to drive home tomorrow.
okay..that's all for now. I've got a game of Rummy 5000 awaiting. I've became quite the card shark again over the past few days. this will be the 4th night of cards in a row. love it.

i'm thinking about wearing safety goggles the next time I cook bacon. 27 doesn't feel any different than 26. but I think birthdays aren't as eventful as time goes on. 2nd thanksgiving this week-whoohoo!! oh yes-and the Christmas parade this weekend. oh it's going to be a great week.........love you all.

11.16.08 x 2

2008-11-16T20:20:00.000-08:00

i'm tired.
exhausted.
seems like Jeremy and I have been on the go...like whoa these days.
i know he's tired
pulled an all-nighter with Juan working on a sweet design.
so i pretty much pulled an all-nighter as well.
i can't sleep when Jeremy's not home.
just doesn't feel right.
plus i always play the worried-mother card..
you know-worried that he got in a car accident on the way home...
i hate those feelings.
hopefully soon..
when we get a little bit of money
we can go away on a little trip
to relax.
maybe over to the coast
or up to ashland.
i have lots to blog about...
but like i said...
i'm exhausted..
mentally and physically..
not a good combination when i'm trying to work on a paper.
only 700 words...
but still.
bleh.
anyway..
peace-loves-a.

11.16.08

2008-11-16T14:41:00.001-08:00

somebody asked what my haircut looks like....
a bit like this........

k bye.

11.14.08

2008-11-14T09:25:00.000-08:00

3 things I'm excited about......

1) having short hair again.
2) second Thanksgiving with friends
3) a homemade Christmas.

Yes, I decided to cut my hair. Think I cut like 4-5 inches off..so it's not short-short like miss Hannah's that looks absolutely stunning.. . but I like it. I think I'm more of a short-er hair person. Long hair is great.... just not for me right now.

Second Thanksgiving. I think credit belongs to Jacob, Joel, and Riley on who began it (although I'm not sure who originated it:)....Anyway-the whole idea is getting together with friends the week after Thanksgiving and having the big old delicious meal-all over again and just being thankful for those who we surround ourselves with. So, we're inviting our life group...plus a few more up to Jonesy's house for a big shindig..it's going to be great. I think I might cook the turkey-which I've never done before.... SO, I'm a bit nervous about that..but I'm sure I'll do just fine...

Third...a homemade Christmas. So Jeremy and I are pretty much going to be broke as a joke this Christmas; but I'm actually quite glad about it. I think people spend WAY too much on presents that we don't really need. We don't. There are plenty of people out there that need-we don't. Anyway, SO I'm planning on making a couple different jams & jellies, jars full of oatmeal goodness and cookie jars (you know how you make the mix and layer it all pretty in a jar), and I think probably some homemade Limoncello and Irish Cream. So yes, excited about that. . .

loves you all.-a

11.11.08

2008-11-11T14:25:00.000-08:00

the enemy has been defeated.
a girl I know is pregnant but nobody else knows. not even the guy involved (or lack thereof). and i don't even think she knows I know. but I've been praying for her and the baby ever since i found out.
she was on her way to get an abortion...boom.
change of heart.
the baby happily grows inside her belly.
beat that Satan.

"the enemy has been defeated..and death couldn't hold You down...we're gonna life our voice in victory..we're gonna make Your praises loud..."

not in our house----------believe it.
God is moving.... like whoa--------experience it.
He is good-------know it.
God first-------------------------live it.

God sees this girl and this baby as beautiful----as His children. He loves them just as much as He loves you or I. Why shouldn't I act the same?

11.9.08 p.m.

2008-11-09T20:36:00.000-08:00

tonight at the stirring we talked about the porn-addicted elephant. . . and really all that porn has done to us as a country. rocked me. to the core. my past comes back and haunts me every once in a while. and my self-worth, my self-image take the blow. my past that told me i had to be a certain way. my past that told me this is all your worth.

not in our house.

God kept giving me words all through the night.
restoration.
healing.
beautiful.
Mine.
cherished.
worth it.
women...........you ARE beautiful. you ARE worth more than this world says you are. you ARE enough----just the way you are------in every way. you don't have to live up to any man's fantasy. you don't have look like the women on tv and in the magazines. you just don't.

not in our house.
i wish i could put into words what's on my heart right now... i just can't get it out.
but girls... guys... talk to me. talk to someone. we're not meant to carry this burden. i can't get "how He loves" out of my head right now... "He is jealous for me..........."

isn't that enough?

11.9.08 a.m.

2008-11-09T11:40:00.000-08:00

finally got Jeremy and I are own Klean Kanteen, at the co-op in Ashland yesterday. Goodbye buying stupid bottles of water. Hello the green way to drink water. plus with all the crap in our water here in Redding... I don't even trust the bottled stuff anymore. and thinking about how much money we'll save... awesome.
i love shopping at co-ops. i really do. someday...maybe Redding will have their own. I really don't get why we don't.
i was excited to find some unbleached wax-paper baggies for packing lunch stuff. these have been around forever-my mom couldn't believe I found them b/c her mom used to use them back in the day when she was a kid. they're really great-say no to plastic! and they're safe to use in the microwave (even though I hate using the microwave).. and they won't contaminate ground water and are non-toxic if you burn them..unlike our plastic baggies. I'm pretty sure you can buy them on Amazon but know for sure you can find them on GreenFeet.
ok enough of my greeness for today..but seriously-it's so easy to do your part.

here's the main reason for this blog. God is moving like crazy in Redding..and in the hearts of those in our community. One family that is really living out our dream for loving on the least here in Redding is The Cables. Last month they threw the people that live at Market Street Manor Hotel in downtown Redding a bbq..and it was a HUGE success...so God gave Chris this passion and He has really given Chris the ideas now...so next weekend..November 22nd, don't make plans. we need your help with a soup feed for these people...check out Chris's blog for more info. I'm SO excited about this. God has totally been putting a chili feed of some sort on my heart for the people in downtown Redding-so a soup feed sounds just as good. There is NO reason that we can't meet all the needs and then some for these people. So talk to Chris, donate some food, plan on helping out Saturday, do it. Remember.... we love.
all this thought of soup..I think I'll go make some Broccoli-Cheddar soup.... mmmm....will be delicious with the fresh sourdough I got up in Ashland....

so keep J and I in your prayers if you think about it. Pray that He'll provide a job for Jeremy and for patience for me. I'm not too worried because I know that God always provides for us-He always has. He always will.
loves you all.-a.

11.8.08

2008-11-08T20:59:00.000-08:00

seriously. every time I go to Ashland... I wonder, why don't we live here.
Such a great town.
great people.
great food.
great coffee.
great beer.
great weather...
sheesh.
my mom and I had a beer at the black sheep last night, her first time sitting at a bar. *so great*
drank an incredible 8 oz. triple latte this morning at Mix, which proudly serves Stumptown coffee...yum. it was probably the best latte i've had in forever..although lately i've been rockin' a plain double shot of espresso. no cream. no sugar. Yes, I know what you're thinking...I am a bad ass.we stayed at the Columbia Hotel. First time staying there-and won't be the last..i seriously felt like I was staying at my Grandma's house or something..and our room looked right down on Main street-it was fun to watch all the people walking around. cheapest hotel right in Ashland too. so if you don't mind staying in an old historical hotel, that's not all fancy shmancy-stay there. you'll love it. the guy at the front desk has an incredible accent that makes you think you're not staying in America.
i feel like blogging more..but it's 9:15 and I'm tired..have to get up at 4:30 tomorrow morning for work. *sigh* I can't wait for the day when I have Sundays off .... someday...
so I made some cookies for the Obama party we went to on Tuesday....
I dubbed them Oat-bama Chocolate chip cookies..they were delish. and no eggs involved.. quite simple..and quite delish.
anyway friends. loves you.-a.

11.4.08....

2008-11-04T21:48:00.001-08:00

crazy.
our kids and grandkids are going to learn about today in history class.
the first African-American president.
wow.
this is incredible.

11.4.08

2008-11-04T15:22:00.001-08:00

big day.
did you vote?
jeremy and i just got back.
didn't have to wait in line.
nice.
for some reason..
i'm really at peace with the whole thing.
well, not at peace..
but I'm not worried about tomorrow.
my allegiance is not to this country.
I am not going to put country first.
I do not believe that one man . . .
can change all the bad to good.
*thanks Dan for rockin' us at the stirring Sunday*
go listen to the podcast.
my allegiance is with Jesus.
He's who I put first in my life.
. . .
I am gOing to a pOlitical party tOnight.
gOOd friends.
gOOd fOOd.
hOpefully celebration.
gOOd times at team rOsten's.

peace.
go vote.
loves-a.

11.2.08

2008-11-02T15:40:00.000-08:00

ah. November.

an amazing fall so far.
a few pictures for you....
of a fun evening
with friends....

pumpkins make Jeremy jump for joy

some of our amazing friends Zach and Kellyi was doing the happy pumpkin dance..
but Jeremy missed the shot.
aren't my pumpkins cute?

today was nice.
chili, cornbread, and cider
with good friends.
i love Sunday afternoons.
especially rainy ones.

10.31.08

2008-10-31T09:12:00.000-07:00

it's been 2 weeks and 5 days since I blogged last.
weird.
i was on a roll there for a while...
blogging every day.
where did i leave off?

.......

well my older and only sister, Jill got married to her darling man Erich.
over at Houda Point in Trinidad.
beautiful beach, despite the fogginess.
got to see a good old friend, Jordan Coghill.
I wish we lived closer-I know Jeremy and him would be come the best of friends.
out surfing and playing the guitar.

anyway.
the wedding was beautiful and small.
short but sweet.
erich's family is full of great people
and so is mine...
so it was a good weekend.
I love Arcata.
the co-op.
the plaza.
the hippies.
the cool, coastal air.
the pot.
j/k...but seriously-we'd been there no more than 30 seconds and we're just beginning to unload our stuff when some guy came up and asked if we wanted to buy some pot. I didn't know what to say..after all we haven't talked about the Stoned Elephant at church yet.... maybe next week..:) just kidding... amazingly enough, i'm proud to say I never touched the stuff-even living in Chico for 2 years and then moving back to Redding to become good friends with drug dealers. God was totally protecting me on that one I think..
jill and erich's reception was last weekend.
out at Whiskeytown-Dry Creek group camp to be exact.
it was fun-lots of work and hecticness..but fun.
lots of cupcakes, tri-tip, and salads.
plenty of beer and wine left over-which was weird.
wasn't expecting that.
got to hang out with some of my great friends I never see anymore...
Leah and Mike...Matt and Andrea
i hate growing up because you don't get to see the people you love as much as you did when you were young...
saw my Aunt Karry (my mom's twin) and Uncle Ed ..pretty sure they're my favorite Aunt&Uncle.
got to see my.... second cousins? i'm not sure-they're my cousins kids.
Aiden and Arianna.
cutest kids ever.
i've only seen them maybe all of 4 times in their lives-but they clinged to me like we were BFF's.
i love kids.
excited to have some of our own someday.

our life group is incredible.
one of these days, we'll take a family photo so you can see all of our friends.
thursday nights have now become my favorite night of the week (bonus that the Office is on thursdays too!)
but seriously-in all of these awkward elephant topics we've talked about..there has been no awkwardness, just comfortable conversation with plenty of laughter.

things i'm looking forward to..in the near--distant future:

1) tuesday. ....... ohana means family...you know what rhymes with ohana?
2) going to Ashland next weekend with my mom.
3) a week vacation after thanksgiving...ahhh.
4) my birthday:)
5) holiday parties.
6) finishing year 1 of 2 in pursuit of my degree!
7) everything involving the holidays....
-second Thanksgiving (and the first one too!)
-Christmas parade & tree lighting
-decorating our Christmas tree---hopefully we can afford a living one this year, if not, there's always our manzanita Christmas tree like last year...
8) thinking more seriously about buying a house, here in Redding (weird, I know).
9) making goodies like pumpkin port butter and cookies for friends.
10) maybe getting a kitty???

just got the new Snow Patrol----A Hundred Million Songs. i love this band. they're one of those I forget about and then when I hear them..... ah, it's falling in love all over again. Snow Patrol was the band playing on my little stereo back in the day..the very first night jeremy and I hung out... stayed up talking till 5 a.m. *what a great way to start our relationship*

anyway..
that was alot of stuff. sorry. it's been a while.
i'll try to blog again soon.
loves you all.-a.

10.12.08 x 2

2008-10-12T19:44:00.000-07:00

greed.
ick.
the elephant.
the BIG pink elephant.
nate.
dude, you rocked it tonight.
for those of you that missed the stirring
tonight.... you need to listen to the podcast.
do yourself a favor.
this was totally my heart tonight.
for the longest time i've been struggling with

how much that we have as Americans.
i got some new perspective tonight....
it's okay to have wealth, but it's how you use your wealth..
is it moving you towards God?
or away?
it doesn't matter how much you have
we're all in the same boat.
i made 28,000 dollars last year.
28,000 dollars! (when i think about it-that seems like SO much to me)
but the crazy part about it all is....
i can have the same level of greed as a person that makes 100,000 a year.
it's not God's fault that we have credit card debt or student loans. . .
it's my fault that I needed all of this stuff so it could fill my drawers and cupboards..
it's crazy that some of our cupboards are full
to the brim.
most of us have plenty of food in our pantries or our freezers to eat off of for at least a week.
doesn't that bug you guys?
that there are people out there that are lucky to get one meal a day.
if any.
we have a closet just for our coats....
our coats that we don't even wear all but once or twice a year.
and then there are those that can't even afford to buy a coat, so they wear a trash bag to keep the rain off...
we have to go out and buy a new pair of shoes because none of our 20 other pairs match our new sweater.
then there are those that don't even own a pair.

or if they do, they're full of holes.

can you imagine what our world would look like if we put aside our greed and focused on the need around us?
can you imagine how much we'd be able to give away if we stopped stock piling for our future? For the "American dream.."...
i'm sorry but screw the American dream.
that's not why God put us here on this earth.
it's not.
we have a higher calling.
to love.
to stop being greedy.
to start caring.
to stop the want.
to start filling the need.

i hope this ruins your world as much as it did mine.
we need it.
we need the change.
i want to be known as someone . . .
. . that gave it all away.
who cares if I don't have a retirement saved up?
I'm pretty sure that God will still be able to provide for me.
i want to be known as faithful.
i want to give it all away.

enough is enough.

one guy i know, Chris Cable is giving it away this weekend...
in the form of a BBQ for the folks living at the Market Street Manor Hotel.
he could use some help.
some people.
some toys for the kids.
some winter coats to keep the people warm.
c'mon, you can help.
stop being greedy.

i hope you know that most of this blog was directed towards myself. . . after all, that's what this is, just a way for me to get my thoughts out. . .
loves-a.

10.12.08

2008-10-12T14:40:00.000-07:00

what a beautiful afternoon.
67 degrees out.
quiet house.
Jeremy's taking a nap
the birds are singing
the wind is gently blowing
i love this.
think i might go take a power nap too.

we went to the downtown eatery last night
pretty sure this will turn into a regular place for Jeremy and I.
great vibe.
dElish food.
nice people.
good beer on tap.
. . . really, just a great place.
they might just give old carnegies a run for their money
if they end up doing a "pint night" of sorts.
but seriously, go check them out sometime.
Say hello to Paul, Joel, David, and Bekah.
or stop into Sugarmama's and tell Kendra hello.
she's a sweetheart and is finally living her dream..
owning her own bakery.
i think someday i'd like to own my own.........
bed and breakfast/bookstore/bakery/coffee shop
hhmmm...
someday.
ok..for reals.
naptime
2 hours before church..
beautiful.
loves-a.

10.10.08

2008-10-10T09:31:00.000-07:00

this is going to be a blog full of photos.
pictures speak louder than words right?
i'm still at a loss for words about the
Sigur Ros show.
i really wish i could convey to you
what we experienced....
oh well, you'll just have to experience it
for yourself.
same with this pie
amazing.
hannah and
i have started a pie club.
jealous?
maybe we'll let you in on the goodness but you'll have to pass a test first.
next week i think we're actually going for a pot pie. seriously.... marie calendars..good old marie. she knows what's up.
hannah is such an incredible girl.
i love her to death.
so young, so educated, so liberal.
conversation with her is great
i love that there is almost 10 years between us..
but there doesn't seem like there's a gap at all.
so either i'm immature for my age...
or she's mature for hers:)
i'm going with the second...
seriously
you see all the confetti in the picture at the left?
i never thought confetti could make me so happy
but wow...
i've been trying to find a video to show all the confetti but.... the sound quality kind of sucks because of all the drumming....but go listen to Gobbledigook and just imagine:)
i've decided that Irresistible Revolution has really ruined my life
especially when it comes to shopping...
i go out
try on some clothes
decide to buy them
and shortly after i leave the dressing room
i remember...
i don't need this.
no matter how i look at it
i don't need this
how can i honestly spend 100 dollars on new clothes?
i saw a quote on a Shane Claiborne video by Ghandi that said...

"There is enough for everyone's NEED but there is not enough for everyone's GREED."
how true it is...

word..... loves you all.

10.4.08

2008-10-04T19:22:00.000-07:00

i don't even know what to say.

Sigur Ros.

They blow me away... every time.
I really don't even know how to explain last night.
I just spent the last 20 minutes on You Tube...
trying to find a video..... so you could feel the experience...
but nothing did it justice.

it was the most amazing night.
the rain held off just till the very end...
i don't think we even cared about the rain
the music got louder.... the rain poured down harder.

i swear the whole crowd was worshipping.
i know i was
i know all my peeps around me were

incredible.

sorry i can't give you more...but really-you just have to experience it.
thanks to Hannah, Heather, Matt, and my honey for making it a great road trip. you guys are incredible. i love you.

we got home at 4 a.m. this morning. strange. that's what time I normally get up for work. needless to say I tried sleeping in but at 8 I was wide awake, laid in bed till 9:30 snuggling with my honey, listening to him sleep. I love those kind of mornings. i'm a lucky girl.

so blessed.

10.01.08

2008-10-01T16:08:00.000-07:00

October? Seriously?.... wow.
went to the DMV today to get my new tags for the Honda. Ran into my old friend Shelby Haskins. God bless the DMV. We ended up going to Yaks downtown to catch up b/c it's been days since we actually sat down and talked. She is such a sweet woman of God and so beautiful. It's funny because she is one of those friends I've known since I was 16 and I'm sure we'll always be friends and be able to sit down and pick up where we left off... a pleasant surprise nonetheless.. I don't really go out for coffee with people anymore, so it was very refreshing. We saw Jared Witt there as well-another amazing person totally in love with God. I'm so blessed-God has surrounded me with such amazing people (and even let me marry one of them!! :) Found out Shelby is going down to see the Sigur Ros show as well...oh it's going to be incredible....
so, it's time for #4.
Sigur Ros.
Take 4.
Oakland, CA. at the Paramount
I want to say 2005.
This was after I'd met Jeremy
and had the pleasure of introducing him to all that is Sigur Ros.
So we get to Oakland early...
weird town.
We found the venue and decided to walk around and find some dinner.
weird town.
the only thing that was open was Subway.
of course like 5 city blocks were blocked off to all pedestrians and traffic.
Why you ask?
Oh because Will Smith was out there in the street...
they were filming Pursuit of Happiness.
great movie if you haven't seen it.
So anyway, ....
showtime.
We finally get to our seats after going up stair after stair.
Balcony seats. awesome.
Awesome because we were in row Y.
yes, as in the next to last letter of the alphabet.
Row Y.
it almost made you dizzy how high up you were.
oh well-it didn't matter. we could see the stage-it's all good.
the lady usher, an elderly black woman...
came up to Jeremy and I
"you two are a beautiful couple..."
and walked away.
lights dim.
music starts.
they look like giants on stage.
playing behind a scrim.
I really think they played like 3 songs with this thing down..it was incredible.
there was like a minute of silence...
in the middle of song.
they just stopped playing.
no one said anything.
no one clapped.
coughed.
whistled.
nothing.

then out of nowhere, they started up right where they left off, all together.
it was INtense.
I told Jeremy on the way down to the show that this would be his best concert ever.
be prepared to be blown away.
to have a spiritual experience.
he didn't believe me.
but up there in Row Y....
he experienced.
he fell in love...

seriously..2 days till Sigur Ros.
**sweet**
i'm feeling much better today in case anyone was concerned. so much that I think I'll go do some housework and make some chocolate chip cookies...
loves you all.---a.

9/27/08

2008-09-30T21:27:00.000-07:00

so. i think i have a sinus infection. yep. that's what my dad said. my whole left side of my face hurts. so bad my teeth hurt. yuck. my dad said to get some cayenne pepper pills and my mom said to do some steam baths (i like those..)... anyway. i think i'll make it out alive. i must. sigur ros is this weekend!
so I never told you about the rest of my trips....
Sigur Ros.
Take 3.
company: Drew Maw
location: San Francisco, the Warfield.
Drew had stayed up the whole night before.
We took his Grandma's.... Grandma car.
He slept the whole time (there and back).
I'd made some sweet mix tapes.
Sang the whole way (so much my throat hurt).
This was one of those squish in like sardines shows.
Amazing still.
they didn't wear shoes.
burned massive amounts of nag champa.
Amina played with them.
(this was my first experience with Amina)
4 phenomenal musicians.
And they are all such cute girls.
The show blew us away.
I remember walking out of the show,
into the cold bay air that chills you to the bone in no time...
and just feeling this high.
It was Drew's first time seeing them..
he was stunned.
We parked in a garage a few city blocks away.
Got to the garage.
Locked.
seriously!?!?!
Walked another 3 blocks around the city..
found another entrance.
Got back in the grandma car...
drove home.
Drew slept the whole way.
I remember I stopped at a rest area..
got out... and ran a few circles around the car.
I think he woke up when I was on circle 2.
Drew's got a great laugh (when he's laughing at you especially..:)

anyway. that was trip 3. 4 and 5 to come. Saturday will be 6.
i'm so excited to be going down with so many of my friends that will see them for the first time..it's so great to be there and experience their first time witnessing all that is Sigur Ros. And at the Greek nonetheless! Pray for sun in Berkeley.. it's an outdoor theater (that is amazing)... This will be my first time seeing them play outdoors *and I am SO excited*...
okay.. it's 9:43.
I need to be in bed.
Hopefully I won't drown in sinusitis tonight.
loves you.-a.

9.27.08

2008-09-27T19:57:00.000-07:00

sad day for Team Coverdale.
little kitty had to go home today.
back to the folks'.
feels kind of empty in our little house.
i made sure and snuggled with her plenty today.
last night i wanted her to snuggle with me before I fell asleep.
couldn't find her....
apparently she'd rather sleep in the bathroom sink.
she also likes to drink out of the tap..while it's running.
crazy kitty.
you will be missed.

9.26.08

2008-09-26T11:16:00.000-07:00

J and I are both sick. stupid. we finally have 2 days off together, in a row, and we've got the nasty. sore throats. stuffy noses. killer headaches. lame.
oh well. i still managed to put a roast in crock pot this a.m. 1 chuck roast. 6 cloves garlic. 2 cups espresso. delicious. well hopefully-we'll see in 8 hours.
life group last night...amazing. i love our new family.
Kelly. Matthews. Nolan. Matt. Brianna. Jordyn. Amy. Jason. Jeremy. Me.
seems like we're all in that place in our lives where we're really ready to start serving God in ALL areas of our lives..not just the "Christian" part. it's so encouraging talking with each other. speaking life to each other. bouncing off ideas..thoughts..discouragements. week 2. great week.
we're about to drop off the WE LOVE t-shirts at the Stirring office. 20 bucks. buy one. shoot, buy 2. i'm wearing mine right now. jealous?... you should be.
loves you all....
ps. this time next week, we'll probably be in Berkeley...eating lunch at Cafe Intermezzo (*amazing*), anticipating all that will be Sigur Ros at the Greek theater....aahhh....

9.22.08 x 2

2008-09-22T21:16:00.000-07:00

just read "how to vote" and "I live with another man's wife" in the new Relevant.
*wow*
go do yourself a favor and buy this. or borrow it from a friend. but read these articles. i'm probably going to be quoting a lot from these 2 articles for days to come.
the mission of a community is to give life to others-that is to say- to transmit new hope and new meaning to them. Mission is revealing to others their fundamental beauty, value, and importance in the universe; their capacity to love, to grow and to do beautiful things and to meet God-------jean vanier

9.dosdos.08

2008-09-22T19:02:00.000-07:00

so some friends of mine... just started up this website .menu central. . ... so get check it out. give them some love. and tell your favorite restaurant how much you would love it if their menu was online. do it. give my friends some love.

stirring last night. *whew* ... nathan "brought it" as some of you would say. i was really impressed with his message. impressed..... inspired.... excited.... i did alot of head nodding last night. who cares about labels? who cares about the religion you follow? who cares about which bar you frequent? who cares about what strip club you went to last weekend? who cares what book you're reading? who cares about the naked girl tattooed on your forearm? who cares how much money you make? .... it's not up to us. like nate said... salvation belongs to God. It's not our job to save people. it's our job to live life with them. love them. speak life and hope into their lives. and to show them, through our lives, that there's IS something worth living for. i know that sounds cheesy..but it's true. . . .

we need to have the posture that Jesus had. at all times. not just at church. or in our life groups. all the time. Nathan threw out a verse from Colossians.... which got me remembering how much I love that book. i've been having a real-bummer of a time at my job lately..having a real hard time keeping a positive attitude-which if you know me..is pretty rare, i'm usually a happy girl, full of joy...and quite a bit of sarcasm sometimes....:) so anyway, i've been having a pretty crappy attitude while at work..or even talking about work.... because well, everyone else is negative there..so I've had a hard time seeing God there (but today I had a conversation with God while facing up the sunflower seeds.. . ).... so last night I dove into Colossians. .
*quick side note*... i know this is why i've been having a hard time seeing God lately-I haven't been in the Word. it's so simple. so essential.

so my friends. be inspired. . .
"Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving...." Colossians 3:23-24

i'm watching HGTV right now. i've come to the conclusion... vacation homes are stupid. can you imagine having SO much stuff that you need 2 houses to fit all of your furniture? . . . i don't know..it's just a strange concept to me. if you want to have a vacation house, then bless someone the other 11 months out of the year that you're NOT there, and let them live there. don't get me wrong... i love to vacation.... i just think it's crazy that people actually spend the money on a vacation home. . . and worrying about if the guest bedroom at your vacation house is BIG enough. seriously. but speaking of houses... we finally put up some shelves in our living room. a good place to put choschkees..right Lauren?

on a sad note...i have to give kitty back this Saturday. she and i have become quite the BFF's. she's sleeping on my lap right now, which means she'll be all wired up and squirly when it's time for bed tonight. great. . .

hey..... welcome my friend Kelly to the blog world.. she's great. one of my most favorite people ever. true story.
loves you all.

9.20.08

2008-09-19T12:32:00.001-07:00

God was at the Squire Room last night.
He totally showed up around 12:30 a.m.
outside, in the parking lot...
as we were getting ready leave.
Jonesy and Matthews and I....
encouraging each other
speaking life to each other
recognizing God in each other's lives.
challenging each other to live out what God has called us to...
incredible.

good night.

pizza at Millhouse..always good.
packed house.
great people around, thanks for coming guys...
Kelly. Pete. Lyn. Jill. Erich. Matthews. Jonesy.
Heather. Chris. BV19. Christian. Jesse.
J. Edwardson. David.
we love being surround by the people that make up our lives.
we made a new friend at the Squire... Mark.
Nice guy, drives for Fed Ex, drinks Bud Light,
likes to fish, pretty down to earth guy.
we played Little Mexico with him.
he schooled us.
we talked about old music that we listened to in Jr.High.
Pinkerton and Dookie.
we talked about relationships
and life.
Jeremy got his number. They're supposed to go fishing.
i hope they do.
i know God has called us to meet people to live life with
in the places most don't think it's okay to go to.
i think you can be intentional with people everywhere you go.
our conversation never involved the word church, Christian, or Jesus...
but what an incredible conversation.
it's amazing when you have incredible conversation..
with a complete stranger. that's what it's all about my friends..
think of how many people Jesus met every day...
and had incredible conversation.
God loves the Squire Room.
got home at 1:37 this a.m.
slept till 8.
ready for a nap again...
kitty is asleep on my lap
i'm drinking a delicious french press.
the mockingbird it outside singing it's heart away....
and it's 67 degrees..
beautiful.

in the alley outside of the Squire Room..
we somehow got to talking about Job..what an incredible story.
we'd been talking about how we'd respond if God asked us to give up...
everything.
feel the love that Jesus had for us----knowing the people he met on this earth---
He was going to die for them...can you imagine being that selfless?
aahhh..
so I decided to take a short break from reading Acts and hit up Job this morning...
it's crazy-the first "test" that God allows Satan to do on Job,
Job lost everything.
he lost his oxen, donkeys, camels, sheep, servants...and his family. all of his son's and daughters... can you feel that? what if God came and took that away from you? I know I'd have a hard time not being angry at God.....
how could Job not be angry at God?.....no.... he worshiped God instead..
falling on his knees in worship
"Naked I come from my mother's womb, and naked I will depart. The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised." Job 1:21

amen brother....amen. we can't take it all with us when we go.......
loves you all-a.

9.19.08

2008-09-19T12:32:00.000-07:00

so i told Hannah that we should trade mixes. seriously. i love making mixes. i remember countless hours of recording songs of the radio and putting them on a tape. yes. a real mix tape. having a big ole stack of cds and my little boombox and making some amazing playlists for my friends. it used to be my thing I did for the boys I had super crushes on. . . I know I've made Jeremy quite a few..
but these days, I make them for friends, for myself (lack of iPod makes it hard to shuffle between all the music you own...
anyway... the mixing of cds... I don't find as much pleasure in it.. for some reason tapes had more love put into them..anyone feel me on this?
Hannah isn't going know what hit her.
the mix has 4.4 hours of music....
61 songs.
mP3 disc I'm thinking..or maybe I'll a 1-2-3 box set...amy's originals. we'll see.
I always have some staples that are on ALL of my mixes...
1) Sigur Ros
2) Death Cab for Cutie
3) Bright Eyes
4) Radiohead
5) Foo Fighters
but lately these days.... it's been more
1) Sigur Ros (yea, this never changes...)
2) Cold War Kids
3) Spoon
4) Wilco
5) Band of Horses....

music is amazing. tells so many stories.... so many songs from my past bring such great memories to mind. remind me of mixes forgotten friends made. road trips with best friends. incredible shows. . .

Sigur Ros Take 2
location: Great American Music Hall---- San Francisco
this trip was with my dear friend Vanessa..
we were both living in Chico at the time.
i believe it was 2001..
the album.. ágætis byrjun
She drove a Dodge Neon
I drove a piece of crap Toyota Tercel
we took her car.
drove 99 down...
car made some funny noises..
we made it.
balcony seats.
we walk in...
The Album Leaf is playing...
they weren't on the bill.
incredible.
Jimmy Lavalle is a genius.
between sets, I turn around to check out the crowd.
some great friends from this band Remember August...
sitting right behind us.
weird how small of a world it is sometimes.
Vanessa and I didn't talk the whole show.
just sad in amazement.
once again.
spent some time with the boys.
went back to Leif's place in Berkley for a while.
got coffee at 2 a.m. at this amazing coffee shop
don't remember much of the drive home.
Sigur Ros kind of does that to you..
puts you in this daze....
almost like a drug.

how amazing is it that it's 1pm...and 70 degrees outside. i'm a happy girl today. this is MY weather. love it. the blues festival tomorrow will be incredible. great weather. great park. great music.... nice....

9.18.08

2008-09-18T22:37:00.000-07:00

just realized I posted the wrong date yesterday. either that or my day went by real fast without me even knowing it.........

tonight was our first life group *yea*.... love having people over at our house.... Thank you Jason, Kelly, Kaitlin, and Amy for joining with us. Jeremy and I were a little worried we'd have a packed house b/c quite a few people said they were coming but they didn't show... so i guess that's good... except I made crazy amounts of goodies....so now there's a bunch of mini-cheesecakes in my fridge tempting me. I heard cheesecake is great breakfast food....:)
anyways, tonight was just a night of getting to know each other...we talked quite a bit about money, possessions, and time..and what we do with them. we talked about the homeless and the lonely....and how sometimes all they need is us to sit and listen to them. . . we talked about how we need to be prepared for the commitments we make.... and how God will show up and He WILL bring you chances to act out what you say you want in your life. . . . I've been reading up on Acts (as most of you are)...and I keep going back to that verse about the people that houses and land that would sell them and give the profit to the church to give to those that had need..... think about it. if God put in on your heart to sell your most prized possession...whether it be your house, your car, your computer...whatever... and NOT keep the money but give it away... how would you feel?
Kelly brought up some great points about wealth...and how wealth is NOT a bad thing. God created wealth..... money is not a bad thing.... but the love of money...that's where it gets bad. it doesn't matter how money you have..the important thing is that you're giving it away. if you have an abundance, give to someone that is in need. it's really not that complicated. really. it's pretty simple.
so what do you think friends? what's your favorite material possession? what if I needed it? or what if I was hurting for cash...and you knew you could get "X" amount for your car..would you sell it?
loves you all. i best be getting to bed..gotta go in to work tomorrow :( then go take my car to the shop... hope Jacob will be okay-he hasn't had a tune up in a while..but i wanted to make sure he's running good for our trip to see Sigur Ros.....

oh yes, Sigur Ros...
take 1.
the first time I saw Sigur Ros was...... 2000.
8 years ago.
yes, i AM their biggest fan.
paid 50 dollars to see them.
well actually 100.
went with my friend Kat.
they played at the Fillmore in San Francisco
*beautiful place*
we realized when we got to Berkeley that the tickets were sitting on the end table.
in redding.
*insert swear word here....* :)
ended up buying a ticket of a scalper out front.
thank God for scalpers.
saw a good friend Matt Krombach (I always butcher his name....:)
he was looking for a ticket too.
made it in just as Sigur Ros took the stage.
Kat and I worked our way all the way to the front.
some crazy Icelandic opera singer was touring with him.
It was incredible.
seriously.
well worth the 100 dollars.
met up with some more friends... (I feel like Olivia and Christian were there too..)
i remember we went to some little cafe afterwards
had milkshakes...
it was all of our first time's seeing Sigur Ros.
words just can't describe.
it's a spiritual experience.
can't wait for take 6....
loves you all.

9.16.08 x 2

2008-09-17T22:01:00.000-07:00

it's 10:02.
ugh... past my bed time...
oh wells.. just got done making 24 mini chocolate chip cheesecakes for Jeremy's birthday/our life group starting tomorrow. oh they look delicious....maybe i'll post a picture tomorrow.... after I make some Bittersweet Guinness Cupcakes. oh yes. beer in cupcakes. oh snap-is that breaking the life-group rules? ah...no worries friends, the alcohol cooks out... no devil's juice :)... but oh, Guinness is so good. tastes like coffee. down it goes..down to my belly...
ok kids. goodnight. sleep well my friends...sleep well.
loves-a.

ps. remind me to tell you the story of the other day when I was doing dishes and my mid-3o's -kinda white trash neighbor was in his backyard, standing in a kiddie pool filled with water. just standing there...... i could've sworn i was on the set for a new Napoleon Dynamite.

9.17.08

2008-09-17T15:40:00.000-07:00

so i made some killah spaghetti last night..yep yep. seriously. who doesn't love spaghetti? Jeremy told me last night it just so happened to be one of his favorite foods.... weird-you think after knowing him for 4 years, being married to him for 1 1/2 of those-i'd know that already..but no, it's news to me..... but seeing as how i love making saucy goodness, this totally works out...figured I'd share the recipe.. its so simple, it's ridiculous....

Amy's Killah Spaghetti Sauce.......
1/2 lb. each spicy hot sausage and sweet Italian sausage (i use pork... but i'm sure you could use whatever kind of meat you like..)
1 red onion, chopped up.
4 cloves fresh garlic, minced (i actually use like 6-7...but not everyone loves that much garlic..and may I stress-use fresh garlic, not the already minced stuff in the jar.... fresh is best)
2 cans (28oz.) crushed tomatoes
1 tbs dried basil (i know i said fresh is best..but when cooking a sauce for a while like this one, dried herbs hold up better..otherwise you gotta add the fresh ones in later in the process and i don't think you get as good of a flava)
S&P to taste (I've got my s&p in grinders..so i just grind away till my arm hurts...that's usually good:)
a few pinches of sugar (this mellows the acidity from the tomatoes..)

that's it..pretty simple. so you brown your meat in a soup pot.... add the onion and garlic-let them cook down for a few minutes..sweat out the yummy flavas... Add the rest of your ingredients and bring to a boil..watch out for erupting bubbles of tomato lava..they can stain a white shirt in no time...and hey-aprons are SO in these days, and i highly recommend them with anything involving tomatoes:)... so you after it comes to a boil, turn the heat down to low, put a lid on..... and go do something else for an hour or so... well, stay at home so you can occasionally stir the sauce..you'll find that the liquid tends to settle at the top, so you'll want to stir it every 15 min. or so...
and you know how to boil noodles right? :).... that's all that's left..boil your spaghetti noodles, pour a big ole ladle full of this meaty sauce on top and sprinkle some fresh grated Parmesan on top...and wa-la. this recipe will make enough sauce for you to throw some in the freezer for a later time.... or to share with a friend..or have a spaghetti feed for your neighborhood...:) Anyway.. you get the idea.
it's so rewarding making simple things like spaghetti sauce... because it's SO easy to just pick up a jar of Prego at the store..and yea, that's okay; but it does not have that home cooked taste..i don't care what you say... sure you can add some spices, thrown in some extra garlic..but by then-you'd be spending more on one jar of sauce than this recipe! oh..and don't forget the french bread..... must have. especially for spaghetti sandwiches the next day...

3 weird facts about me..in the kitchen......
1) i love to peel garlic cloves... most people hate it, some how I enjoy it.
2) i use onions in almost every dish and they ALWAYS make me cry..i keep thinking i'll become immune to it; but no. how do they do it on cooking shows... must be fake onions.
3) mincing herbs makes me happy. it's amazing to take a big bunch of cilantro or parsley and just mince away and end up with this tiny little pile of goodness.

alright... enough of the amy's weird kitchen world.... tell me about yours...... c'mon, you've gotta have something. c'mon humor me.
oh yes.. tomorrow is Jeremy's birthday..... we're going out to MillHouse on Friday night for pizza and fun... Join us?
one last thing.. i'd like to give a shout out to my BF Bloggers Christian and Hannah for always leaving me great comments:) you guys are great. Sigur Ros. T-minus 16 days.

a little picture from our camping trip on the coast July 08 with Team Rosten and friends. this was after I'd drank a whole french press to myself... nothing better than sitting by the fire early in a.m., coffee in hand, mist on the face, everyone still sleeping.....aaahh, i love that part of camping. sorry Jesse, I stole this picture from you..don't hate me. :)
i guess i've been feeling inspired lately..blogging like whoa. i think i'll blog about my Sigur Ros shows next... in anticipation :) loves you all.

9.16.08

2008-09-16T20:27:00.001-07:00

paper done.
*sigh of relief*
i hate writing papers. why am i a psychology major? seems like all i do is write papers. sometimes i question my major.... i just want to teach kids. . . help them... understand them... so i guess psychology isn't a bad idea after all... i've had some real weird feelings about the whole "career" thing lately. Do you think this is what God intended for us? Do you think He wants us to sink thousands of dollars into a degree just so we can get a better paying job?. . . . it makes me sick thinking about it sometimes. I feel like there's a whole nomad-hippy world out there we could all be living. a world that isn't concerned with money, fancy cars, big houses. . . ugh. i keep going back to that passage in Acts..about the people that had land and houses, would sell them-and bring the money to the Apostles, all of the money-not just some of it... just so the wealth could be shared among the people. Why don't we do that? Do you think God intends for us to have money in saving accounts? . . . or do you think He wants us to put HIS money back into the community-back into loving people. . . tHiCk. .. ...
this whole money thing going on with Wall Street and the economy has really lessened my faith in the American way of living... well maybe not faith-but my hope for the future. . .. maybe it's not a bad thing living paycheck to paycheck. maybe it's not a bad thing renting a duplex. maybe its not bad having a 10 year old honda and a 20 year old Jeep. maybe it's okay that i work at grocery store.
i don't know... I just feel that God has something bigger for us---a better way of living..but we get so caught up in the american way of life...that we forget what our real purpose is. we're here to spread the love..not stock in up in our bank accounts.
i've kind of come to terms with the fact that Jeremy and I aren't going to have a super nice house and fancy cars..but that's okay..as long as my house is a place where people feel comfortable... a kitchen big enough to feed everyone i know... plenty of floor space for friends to crash when needed. . . i've kind of become fond of our little place lately.... it's not much; but hey its what God has blessed us with right now---and it works. it totally works.
Jeremy and I are super excited about life group starting this week..a little worried about not having enough room :) had lots of people say they were planning on coming so far..i think that's great though---so what, we might not all get a spot on the comfy couch; but we'll be meeting together....locking arms... lovin'.
anyway... just a few thoughts. had to get something creative down after writing that paper...... loves you all.

9.14.08 x 2

2008-09-14T19:48:00.000-07:00

i think God has given me a heart for this city again. . . Jenna led that song... "there is no one like our God." you know the one that goes "Greater things have yet to come, greater things are still to be done in this city...."
last time we sang this song, i was bitter. Bitter? not sure if that's the word, but more discontent. Jeremy and I had talked so much about moving to Portland in the next couple years that my heart had already moved. it sucked. every day i was looking at craigslist (which is pretty normal for me....I'm addicted)...but in Portland. . .
then all of the sudden the other day I realized how happy Redding makes me right now. God is moving so much in my life, here. I just wasn't giving Him the chance to show it to me. Jeremy and I were down at the park by the river the other day, having a lovely picnic....we talked about being more committed here. . .even if that means liking the palm trees... (see previous post:)
it's so hard to not get caught up in the world of having a good paying job. because we all know that Redding is not the easiest place to get one of those.... but I know that's not the point in following God. He could care less about how much money we make or how much money we have in our savings account. He cares about what we give away. He cares about what we share.
a while back I think I shared this.... but I want to be remembered as faithful, not successful. . .

faithful
not
successful

this is what God's calling me to be. faithful. and in that being faithful... i want to give. i want to love. i want to stop being so selfish with my time. i want to commit myself to you----- my family.
i can't wait for Thursday when our life group starts.... i can't wait to have people into our home. to share what God has blessed us with. to break bread. to eat cupcakes. to kick back with my family. to lock arms with them.

"to be a part of the church was to join a countercultural society that was partnering with God to create a new kind of culture, right under the nose of the caesars. These Christians made sure everybody in their midst had enough to eat. They made sure everybody was able to pay their bills. They made sure there was enough to around. . . " -Rob Bell, Velvet Elvis

9.14..08

2008-09-14T14:10:00.000-07:00

51 palm trees.
1 road.
seriously?
i've been meaning to blog about this for a while...but I keep thinking, maybe they'll grow on me. but no..they haven't. Maybe if I lived in Hawaii I'd be okay. Just think if you were driving on a road in Hawaii and you saw a bunch of Maples, Oaks, or Fir trees..just wouldn't look right. . . oh well. apparently the nor-cal thing wasn't working for us, we're going for nor-wish-we-were-so-cal. maybe it's just me.
i've even got Jack Johnson playing right now... just not feeling it, Redding.
and hey..why don't we close cypress too. just makes me want to stay on the west side. i'm not a freeway driver...and now I'm being forced to. lame. but hey-December 2010 is just around the corner, seriously? they've been working on that bridge for a year already-they need 2 more? . . maybe I should go help.....:)

planted flowers yesterday. helped the husband hang some shelves. rearranged the living room a bit. cooked a pot roast. baked a tasty, fresh peach cobbler. Hannah joined us for dinner. she's amazing. I love how God brings different people into my life of all different ages. it's wonderful. Heather came over later-she's amazing too. and the best part... we all have tickets to see Sigur Ros down in Berkeley on October 4th. This will be time # 6 I've been so blessed to see them perform. ***aaaahhhh*** (that was a wonderful sigh, not a scream).... we're planning on hitting up IKEA and H&M while we're down there.. maybe a little Rasputin's...Amoeba...Buffalo Exchange..you name it, we'll be there.

so i'm procrastinating. I have a 1050-word paper due tomorrow in my Biological Foundations of Psychology class....not feeling very inspired at the moment. Interesting topic though... the treatment of ADHD with extended release stimulants and non stimulants along with the development and use of clinical guidelines...oohhh, sounds wonderful doesn't it? sure. just not exactly how i'd love to spend my Sunday afternoon. Just made myself a tasty couple shots of espresso on ice-the real stuff-no foofy here.... going to go at it for an hour... get ready for church.. come home, work on the paper a bit more.... and watch Extreme Home Makeover :)
take care friends... -a.

9.13.08

2008-09-13T09:23:00.000-07:00

sometimes you're on a blog-roll.... this is one of those times.
woke up this morning at 7am. that's sleeping in for me. *sigh* husband still sleeping soundly.... it's actually okay, I like the quiet mornings......
this morning in particular has been quite lovely. a slight chill in the air, windows open all night... got the flannel pj pants on..... first morning since April that I made a french press...drank it all to myself..... Put a roast in the slow cooker. I love chopping up veggies in the morning. I always feel so productive and ..... like susie-homemaker....:) the house is already starting to smell wonderful. Is it fall yet?.. so maybe I'm jumping the gun a little bit, pulling out the crock pot..but who cares that it's supposed to be 97 today... i'll just transpose the numbers and say 79 will be the high for today.....
thanks to Christian, I picked up Velvet Elvis again. My mother-in-law had this book before us... not sure if it was Jeremy's or hers..anyway, she marked some pages, actually quite a few pages, so I was scanning through them.... and came across this one section that slapped me in the face......check it..
"there is an issue of identity. it is letting what God says about us shape what we believe about ourselves. This is why shame has no place whatsoever in the Christian experience. It is simply against all that Jesus is for. As the writer to the Romans put it 'Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.'
None.
no Shame.
No list of what is being held against us.
No record of wrongs.
It has simply been done away with.
It is no longer an issue.
Bringing it up is pointless.
beating myself up is pointless.
Beating others up about who and what they are not is going the wrong direction. It is working against the purposes of God. God is not interested in shaming people; God wants people to see who they really are.
'Let us live up to what we have already attained.'
I am not who I was.
You are not who you were.
Old person going away, new person here, now.
Reborn, rebirthed, remade, reconciled, renewed.
Jesus put is this way: 'You are in me and I am in you.'
When we stumble and fall back into old patterns, we call them what they are: old patterns. Old ways. Old habits of an old person.
Something new is happening inside of us.
I thank God I am forgiven.
I make amends with anyone who has been affected by my actions.
And then I move on.
Not because my sin isn't serious, but because I am taking seriously who God says I am. The point isn't my failure: it is God's success in remaking me into the person he originally intended me to be.
God's strength, not mine.
God's power, not mine...." -Rob Bell

I think I will leave it at that..... Rob Bell, bring it.
peace-a.

ps-you didn't now Jesus and Elvis were BFF's? yea..... me neither...

9.12.08 x 2

2008-09-12T17:46:00.000-07:00

a reason i've been too busy to blog lately..lil' kitty keeps me entertained. she's super sweet and loves to take naps with me. of course when she wakes up, she runs around like a crazy kitty for about 30 minutes. i have a feeling i'm going to have a hard time giving her back to my mom when she gets home from vacation.

seems like a lot of our friends are going green lately. i love it. i just bought a bunch of cloth napkins on clearance at wal-mart. yea, they're not made from any organic recycled material..but hey, not using paper napkins is awesome. i decided to make the switch earlier this year. it's so easy people. next thing to get rid of..paper towels. of course we bought a pack of them at costco a few months back..so we'll have to wait until those run out..but then, it's microfiber towels. they're great. i've got a few that i use for cleaning, love them. we waste so much paper these days its ridiculous. so there's my encouragement to keep up the green-ness. oh yes, our other next green step is to by some SiGG water bottles. it's so easy to buy cases upon cases of water bottles...but why do we have a filtration system hooked up to our water faucet if we don't utilize it. seriously.

i've been happy to be cooking again. the summer is always hard b/c it get's so stinking hot. we bbq'd alot..lots of kabobs, i think the fave of the summer was the bacon-wrapped chicken kabobs. delish. everything is better wrapped in bacon. potato slabs became a staple just like corn on the cob. now that it's cooled off a bit, i'm happy to be using the old stove again. a couple things this week.... spicy white chili.... not giving you the recipe though... getting ready for a potential chili-cook off next month, can't give you my secrets. A sliced sirloin with steak frites in a shallot pan reduction (wow, that sounded quite culinary of me, eh?) was served the other night when the Harrisons joined us for dinner. a yummy cut of affordable meat served with a sauce made of shallots, brandy, and some other tasty ingredients..and homemade french fries baked in the oven. yummers. it's way cheaper to make your own than to buy the bag of frozen ones. this has been something else i'm trying to do lately-make everything I can.... it's amazing the stuff we have in our cupboards that can make the most delicious stuff. my latest creation was a yummy herb vinaigrette for a fresh green salad..
tasty tasty....
1/3 cup evoo (extra virgin olive oil for those of you that don't speak rachael ray)
1/3 cup white wine vinegar (cider, rice or white can be used too-whatever you got on hand)
1 tsp sugar (add more if you like it sweeter..just not too much:)
1 tbs snipped fresh basil, oregano, and thyme (or if you don't have these fresh, use dried but just 1/2 tsp each, and make sure you crush the herbs in between your fingers to release the flava)
1/4 tsp dry mustard (or if use 1 tsp Dijon-style mustard if you don't have the dry stuff)
1 clove garlic (or 2 if you like it real garlicky..i used a HUGE clove that probably would be considered 3 small cloves...gotta keep those vampires away after all..)
and a few grinds of fresh black pepper... to taste

so easy, combine all the ingredients in a screw top jar and shake shake shake. put outkast on and shake it like a Polaroid picture. i used to love that song.
anyways, if you use fresh herbs, this will be good for 3 days (keep in fridge) or if you use dry it'll last up to 1 week in the fridge. good stuff. think next time I'll use balsamic vinegar to mix it up a bit.
aaahh, i love writing about cooking. maybe i should become a food editor. oohh, better yet, i could be a judge on Iron Chef. I love that show. even better-Gordon Ramsey's Kitchen nightmares just started up. sweet. it's on Thursday nights, so any of you that join us thursday night for our life group are more than welcome to stick around and watch it with us :) we're kind of addicted....
okay. 2 blogs in one day. 2 long blogs. I could probably go for 3; but I'll wait... are you even still reading? goodness. what dedication. loves you all-a.

09.12.08

2008-09-12T11:13:00.001-07:00

yesterday was 9/11. I heard people talking about it all day at work yesterday. that's what happens when you work at a grocery store. people either talk about the weather, the economy, or politics. my day started with this real nice old man asking me if I remembered where I was....
I was working at Java Detour down in Chico, i'd opened that morning..at 4.45. I was going about my business when my every morning cab driving customer pulled up and told us to turn our stereo to the news. I couldn't believe it. I didn't really know what to think. Al was the last customer that showed up that morning. My boss let us go home early since there was nobody coming through. Driving home, I just felt scared.... unsafe. Of course I called my parents, they didn't really know what to say either; but not to worry-I should be safe down in Chico. I had to work at my other coffee shop later that morning...so as I walked the 8 blocks there I thought alot about America... and then I thought alot about the other countries that hated us so much they'd attack us. I felt sorry for them because I know that their actions had to have had a cause of some sort. I thought of the wives of the men who flew the planes, I thought of the people on the planes, I thought of the firefighters that died saving others. Too much to process. I walked into Moxie's and my boss and some regular every day customers were sitting around the television that Matthew had brought it.... drinking beer.. just sitting quietly. I "worked" 6 hours there. Then walked home. Jill and I were living on West Sac. in Chico in some real ghetto apartments. we were the only whiteys in the complex. it was so quiet on the walk home. nobody was out. for chico, that's weird. . . . strange that it's been 7 years. I remember the first year after 9/11 and everyone thought there would be another attack on the same day. people are funny like that..
anyway, this old man yesterday morning after listening to me tell my story told me where he was. He said he was driving downtown and an Iranian woman was crossing the street in front of him and he wanted to get out of his truck and yell at her to go home...go back to HER country. My heart dropped when I heard this.... this is why America is the way it is people. We treat other countries like crap. We have made America look so glorious and extravagant that yea, of course everyone wants to come live here. Don't get me wrong-I'm glad I live here but sometimes I wish I didn't. . . .
we as Christians especially have a higher reason to love these people of other countries...and I know it's easy to get all political and all patriotic..but I'm sorry-we're supposed to love those people to-even the ones that have been responsible for terrorist attacks. Jesus didn't refuse His love to ANYone..so why should we? we're so comfortable as Americans.... that when something like this happens, love goes out the window. it's stupid. we get so caught up in what people are doing or have done that we forget to love the people. remember that old saying "hate the sin, love the sinner".. yea-that's what we're supposed to do. We have to walk so people know that we're different. We have to talk so that people will hear nothing but love. We have to act like we actually care about everyone. We have to live so that Jesus shines through. We have to love.
simple as that.

we have to love.

We love. from the Stirring on Vimeo.

9.2.08

2008-09-02T14:41:00.000-07:00

some things i've been looking forward to....
1) kitty sitting my mom's new kitty for 2 weeks...she's unnamed but I call her 'Lil.
2) starting a life group on September 18th (which just so happens to be Jeremy's birthday too!)
3) organizing a soup club.
4) starting up a community garden with the stirring.
5) maybe a chili cook-off? first annual stirring cook off.. yes, has a nice ring to it.

it's incredible to feel God giving me ideas again.

some other stuff going on...
1) Jeremy and I started a 2 week diet yesterday. he's already hating it. I think I'm more stubborn than he is though..but trust me ice cream sounds SO good right now!
2) we're thinking about going to Disneyland after Thanksgiving...
3) fall seems like its just about to bless us with her wonderful weather..
4) school..still going. only 1 year and 3 months till I have my bachelors!

anyway.. hope everyone is well. loves-a.

peace. i'm outta here.

2008-08-22T07:59:00.001-07:00

in case you're missing me....
i'm heading out of town this weekend
sister's "bachelorette" party.
a girl's weekend.
jill, my mom, and me.
will be SO much fun.
pedicures
sisterhood of the traveling pants 2. (yes i know.)
bonfires
sangria
the Morning Thunder in Quincy
German apple pancakes
laughter-and lots of it.tri-tip and grilled salmon
vino
tears
some old bar in Susanville
a new kitty to play with
a new mix cd to listen to on the 2 hour drive
good times with my best friend, my sister
spent with my other best friend, my mom.
4 days away from work.
*sigh of relief*

my best best friend, my dear husband will most likely be bored and have no idea what to do without me :)... and probably won't know what to eat for dinner-so call him, i'm sure he'd love the company :)
ok... must go shower and finish packing.. girls weekend in t-minus 57 minutes. sweet.
loves you all.

8.14.08

2008-08-14T17:59:00.000-07:00

6pm...
it's 109 out.
gross.
i swear squeaker's water dish was boiling over earlier.
why do people live here?
could be worse.... could have no air conditioner.
or swamp cooler in our case (which does not really compete with anything over 105)...

90210 is coming back.
seriously?
the O.C. was totally the 90210 of the 21st century.
I'd rather watch Seth Cohen and Ryan Atwood.......
since it's so hot out.. i'm thinking it's time for one of those marathons.
the O.C. anyone?
c'mon we can eat ice cream, lay in front of fans, and watch some serious drama....

:)

8.11.08

2008-08-11T20:37:00.000-07:00

1 sound I'm hearing right now:
1) squeakers, the grey kitty that decided we're bffs, meowing outside my door.

2 reasons I don't hate wal-mart as much as I used to:
1) free schick quattro razor (i've been using the cheapy bic dipsosables..ick)
2) horchata popsicles. (serioulsy? these are the next best thing to well, horchata)

3 things I'm thinking about right now.
1) my back and neck are killing me
2) these grapes are delicious (farmer's market...best grapes ever)
3) do people really watch High School Musical? b/c I don't get it.....

4 thoughts I've had lately:
1) I want to be known as faithful, not successful
2) I wouldn't mind sharing housing-hippy commune style
3) I need to live in the now, not in the future
4) I'm so blessed....

5 bands I've been listening to lately
1) Coldplay
2) Spoon
3) Cold War Kids
4) Jack Johnson
5) Augustana

it was a list making night tonight. I've been doing statistics homework for the last 3 1/2 hours. ugh......

2008-08-03T20:26:00.000-07:00

this song has been killing me lately....."tonight the stars speak" by the Glorious Unseen give it a listen... or two. it's so simple. .

Tonight the stars speak of your infinite love. And it serves to remind me that what I have means nothing at all compared to your glory, oh Lord. How long ‘till your voice speaks clearly? How long ‘till your arms envelope me? I cry – be my strength when I am weak. Oh Lord, have mercy on me please. My spirit is willing but my flesh is so weak. I cry in your arms now. God, grant me the strength to rest in you. I lift my hands and cry.

whew. that second line.... what I have means nothing at all, compared to your glory...... I can't even begin to explain...

I know I haven't blogged in a while... just haven't felt.. inspired I guess you could say. lots on my mind just not able to get them down on paper.

good stuff though. just lots of stuff floating around in this little brain. Portland is looking more and more like a probably versus a possibly....
anyway.. . go listen to that song. you might recognize a certain guy in the band.. he's good in the Glorious Unseen..but don't you think he'd do better leading at the Stirring? :) on that note... God was all over Jenna tonight. . . my friend Jonesy and I were just amazed at her voice-the soft, power.... *whew*
I've been focusing on alot of other things more than my relationship with God. it's stupid. plain stupid. it's time to change that. my dear friend Rosetta and I had a great convo the other day and we're talking about hard it is to not put your husband first..ya know? but i realized (thanks to Rosetta:) that's why I get upset with Jeremy sometimes.... because I'm expecting him to fulfill all the needs that God is supposed to fill....it just makes so much sense when you look at it that way...well friends.... i'll leave you with a picture...been a while since one of these...:) loves you all.

goodbye redding

2008-07-18T11:47:00.000-07:00

hello patrick's point. we leave in an hour and 12 minutes. sweet. i'm exhausted. pretty much been cooking and baking up a storm since 5pm yesterday. my feet are killing me. i needed one of those chef's mats to stand on...... but the fun begins shortly. i can't wait. team coverdale. team rosten. team markle. and team p.b. lance. sweet. great food. great drinks. great hikes. great friends... good times...
made avocado salsa. turkey and beer chili. yummy pasta salad. brownies. and cinnamon rolls. *whew* cut up fruit. ground coffee. got it all packed. sweet sweet. time to load up the car. clean up the kitchen...and wait for my honey to come home.
I just checked the weather in Trinidad. it's 52 degrees over there. bEAUtiful.
...............peace.

some things about this week

2008-07-05T09:16:00.000-07:00

happy 5th of July people. kind of a weird 4th, eh? oh well-just think how amazing it will be in October or whenever the reschedule the fireworks for, to kick back in cooler weather and watch the lovely display...
it's been a good week. had tyler over for dinner one night. our dear friend kelly another night. went over to the blacks house Wednesday night. spent Thursday night at home with my honey. last night, bbq with team rosten. *wow* no wonder i've been tired this week. i love hanging with people though... totally worth it.
went to the gym Wednesday... for the first time since March. i've been walking around like an old person all week, just ask jeremy. i think i may have overdone it for the first time back. but there was this little old guy on the elliptical next to me that was just jamming away..80 years old (my guess), completely sculpted calves, level 4 (yea, I peaked)... and after my 20 minutes he was STILL going.. shoot. one of the main reasons i haven't gone (besides being lazy:) is that i was nervous about scanning my card.... then my info pops up..... and whoever is sitting there at the desk can see how long it's been since i scanned my card last. shoot. i walked in, smiled at the guy sitting at the front desk (a smile like, c'mon you know me, i'm here every day) scanned my card and walked off. Either he didn't actually look at the screen... or maybe he had some sympathy on me.... or maybe he really just didn't care...... i think it was more of the 3rd. anyway..i feel good. much better today. think I'll drag jeremy down there with me today....nothing like working out with my honey.
we both got haircuts this week. God bless Amy Endicott. i love getting my hair cut by her. the conversation is always incredible...i normally leave feeling like I just was saved all over again :) great woman of God she is.
i'm taking a college algebra class right now.. *bleh* it actually hasn't been that hard..just a ton of work to do. i laugh at myself b/c many times i say, screw algebra, i'm figuring this one out my own way! :) And amazingly enough, I figure it out..without all the x's and y's. i like to call it amebra.
last night was a great night. went over to jesse and lyn rosten's for a lovely bbq. beer brats, yoshida's chicken, bell peppers and onions..*yum* I made some killer salsa that I think is going to be my favorite thing to take to partys... lyn made some yummy black bean and corn salsa.. and we finished off the night with homemade milkshakes... full bellies... so we went for a walk through the downtown houses.... i love it over here..so many cute houses, quiet streets, dark alleys :)... really it was great night. how amazing is it to be able to see the stars again. got home a little after midnight. we're going camping in 2 weekends with them at Patrick's Point. sounds like it is going to be a camping trip to remember:) *so excited*
if any of you have been over.. you've probably met our neighbor alyn. he's kind of a strange man; but I've definitely grown to like him. he takes care of a lot of stuff around the place and is always on the look out for any people coming around that shouldn't be. he's kind of like my undercover security guard. anyway, the other day, he washed our our trashcan. not like a small one that you wheel out to the street on Trash day.. no the big-ass white ones that the garbage truck uses that forklift thing on the front to pick up. crazy. awesome. now our trash smells more like pine-sol than trash:) Love it.
ugh.. it's 9:30 and i can't get my butt in gear. . . want to go down to market but i hate going this late....... hhmm.. maybe i'll go. there's always the one tomorrow... hhmm.. ok fine, I'll go. loves you all..have a wonderful weekend.

7.02.08

2008-07-02T21:49:00.001-07:00

i'm still on this money and material things kick. seriously. it's all i think about these days. God's been laying this on heavy in my life. it's just weird b/c I know that God does bless some people with lots of money, huge houses, and an endless supply of whatever they need. There are those people that don't have to check their bank account before they go shopping. There are those people that fall asleep in a 4 bedroom house at night..using only one room most of the year. There are those people that don't care that it costs 100 bones to fill up their gas tank. I don't know..it's just weird. I think that God can bless us in incredible ways--- ways that we could never imagine...but the only way we're going to get there is if we're completely and totally relying on him. And how are we relying on Him when the extra money we have, we go spend on new clothes.. instead of helping someone out. we're comfortable Christians. we totally are. I don't care if you say you aren't b/c i know I'm not..... i really am striving towards not being so comfortable. it's retarded. i think about our spare bedroom that we don't even use...that's just piled with boxes of stuff from when we moved... boxes that I haven't needed for the last 2 months. it's stupid.
anyways. just some thoughts. thanks to the blacks for the invite tonight. good people.

tahoe loven..

2008-06-28T19:03:00.000-07:00

hello friends. just got back from lovely Tahoe. lovely Tahoe. It was BEAUTIFUL over there... a little smoky; but gorgeous still. we had fun. road trip with the girls. devil's juice with friends, old and new. a wonderful wedding. fun sunburns. great breakfast. amazing families. Jeremy did an incredible job on the pictures... but I think it really helped that Jamie is so naturally beautiful, and Pete, well he IS a Metz... all combined with the sparkling blue water of Tahoe.... and well- it was wonderful. I'm sure Jeremy will post some pictures this week.. Keep an eye out.
the trip left me with a lot of time to think...... was thinking about this whole money issue I blogged about a few days ago.... I think some people took me the wrong way and I wanted to explain myself a little more. I think that as a community we do not live below our means so we can help others. seriously. we have to have SO much. we have to drive a nice car so people will think we have money. we have to wear name brand clothes so people won't think we shop at Wal-Mart. we pay more rent than we can afford, just so people will talk about how nice our place is. we go on expensive vacations so we can brag to all of our friends. now tell me... why the hell do we have to have all this crap? None of this means ANYTHING. and I'm speaking about all of us, myself included-our lives in general-not just related to the Stirring. Everyone needs to re-evaluate what's really at the top of our priorities. Think about it...if for some reason you got 100 bucks in the mail from whoever..would you think-sweet, I can go buy that new shirt i want (to hang in my closet full of shirts) or do you think, awesome, How can I bless someone with this gift? Seriously. Think about it. We can get by on SO much less than we think we can. And when you realize that.... you've got all this extra cash flow to bless people with. or maybe it's not even cash, maybe its extra food-invite someone over for dinner.. if you've got some extra gas money, fill up someone's tank. I don't care what you do... just learn to live on less. As a community if we did that-we'd be able to do SO much.
anyway.... just some of my thoughts... that's what this blog is for. take them or leave them. I don't care. loves you all.

amazing

2008-06-25T17:37:00.000-07:00

sigur ros. simply amazing. this is blog #2 in a row about them. Yes. go buy their new album- it is simply amazing. they blow me away. Go buy it. I can't spell it...and tried to figure out how to say it...but I don't speak Icelandic. sheesh. I should learn. . .

watching the news right now... seriously. all of FarNorCal is going up in flames. 157 burning just in Shasta Co. alone. crazy. I look like a stoner..my eyes are so red from the smoke. . . can't sleep at night.... gross. i can't turn on the swamp cooler b/c then my entire place smells like smoke. gross. God bless Redding.

heading over to Tahoe tomorrow with Meg & Kristena. Should be a fun little road trip... we're going over for Pete Metz and Jamie White's wedding. it's about damn time those two got married! Hopefully it'll be nice over there.. Jeremy said it was a little smoky over there..but not bad. either way, it'll be nice to get away.

it's crazy that the 4th of July is next weekend. i'm beginning to wonder if they're going to still have the fireworks... probably not the best idea to shoot off FIREworks when there's hundreds of fires burning all around us. . bummer. I love fireworks. maybe we'll go up to Mt. Shasta and watch theirs..of course I'm sure it's pretty smoky up there too. Maybe we'll drive over to the ocean. *ah* I miss the ocean. I was actually just thinking about it the other day b/c some of our friends are heading over camping at Gold Bluffs this weekend. something about the ocean, i feel relaxed just thinking about it... the sand...the waves...the quiet.... the fog....the smell... dang.. i need to go over there. it's good for my soul. God speaks to me so much in the outdoors...well, I should rephrase that-I hear Him so much more in the outdoors.... that's a good reason I want to live a simpler life...get rid of all the noise. all the crap that we fill our days with.... ya know?

anyway...... keep it real friends. i'm going to go buy a baby panther I think... or maybe i'll just start feeding the neighborhood cat.... loves you all.

is it october yet?

2008-06-22T21:32:00.001-07:00

sweet. sigur ros. berkely. greek theater. october 3rd. ooooohhhhh snap, i'm excited. it's on a friday.. So i'm thinking that it's going to be a great chance to make a memorable weekend in the city. their new album comes out tuesday. go buy it. believe it or not Target has it for 7.98. Go Target-beat out Best Buy...but don't buy all of them-I need to get a copy too!! :)
went to church tonight. I feel weird about church sometimes. sometimes I just get sick of how nice our church is. I'm lounging back on a comfy, overstuffed couch listening to Nathan talk about how crappy the Stirring finances are....and all I'm thinking is.... well why do we have such a nice place then.. If our rent is too much....then lets just meet outside. we can sit on the ground if we have to. . . not run the a/c if we have to... you know what I mean? it just kills me how much we are comfortable Christians. it's stupid. I think the inner-hippy in me comes out sometimes (did i really just say inner-hippy? yes. i did.) and wants to rid myself of all of our modern comforts and live life the simple way. . . I want to live in a community that is like what Shane Clairborne talks about in Irresistible Revolution. I want my house to be where anyone can come over and eat...but I want other people to want that to-and be able to sacrifice enough to accommodate that. it's not easy...but if its something that you feel God has called you to do-why the hell aren't you doing it!?!?!? (i'm talking mainly to myself here....but maybe some of you feel me on this...) We read these amazing books on what the Christian community should like and books that bash on the Church...and we get all pumped up reading them..but as soon as we close the book...it's back to our normal day-to-day life... why do we forget all the stuff that pumped us up? sheesh...
.....went to WinCo tonight. just walked in and was squeezing the peaches. yes. i squeeze the peaches before i buy them. they were hard. i didn't buy them. I turn around and in walks Chad and Jordan. 2 of my old friends from back in the day. it blew me away that I saw them. we talked for a little while but it kept getting silent and we just looked at each other-tripping out. I haven't seen Jordan (who lives in Eugene, OR now) for.... shoot 4 years or so?....and Chad (who lives in North Carolina now) for atleast 4. It was really good to see them. Old friends that just make you smile.
Dinner tomorrow night should be fun...Peter and Christian are coming over..I invited Jordan and his family to come over too-but he wasn't sure if they were heading back to Oregon tomorrow or Tuesday...and of course we'll be bbq'n :) That's how we roll. and it's so smoky outside..we might as well add some more :)
. . . ok kids. I need to do some homework.... love you all.

Death and all of his friends.

2008-06-21T12:35:00.000-07:00

so i just listened to the new Coldplay album, twice. INtense. maybe it has to do with the incredible thunder rocking and lightning flashing outside my window. I feel like i live in the Midwest right now. anyway. props to Coldplay for actually making album that sounds different than the last 3. I think the live show for this album I'd actually want to go to. Seems like it have some crazy energy. I've seen on t.v. some of their other shows... kind of boring to me. But seems like they've tapped into something good with this album. yea. this is a feel good album. . . . next comes the new Sigur Ros. *whew* from what I've heard so far.... sounds amazing and incredibly different from anything I've heard of theirs before. bummer that the presale tickets sold out in a matter of hours. hopefully we'll get our hands on some tickets. Portland or Berkeley..either one..we'll be their, even if we have to buy them from those damn scalpers that make a killing..... every time I see Sigur Ros play...it's like the first time. I've got a pretty good track record with them... in the last 7 years I've seen them 5 times. let's make it six people.
didn't make it to farmer's market today. was afraid I'd get struck by lightning.... seriously, I'm almost too scared to walk to the mail box! oh how i love summer storms. God has somehow made this day incredibly relaxing for me...almost feels like I've had my normal two days off instead of just one.... beautiful.
we had a couple good coverdale family dinners this week. been grilling almost every night. we love our new bbq. think I'll do some fish tacos next week! RR has this recipe that I've been dying to try....
everyone has been asking about our vacation. i promise I'll blog more about it later... just know that team coverdale has put Portland in their 1-5 year plan.

saturday in the a.m.

2008-06-21T08:01:00.000-07:00

I was all excited about sleeping in this morning, first morning after a long week at work, first morning off after vacation.. and i was WIDE awake at 6:30. *bleh* but in actuality that is sleeping in for me... since my alarm normally goes off between 4:30 and 5. but still. seriously? Jeremy is still sleeping, snoring away. I laid in bed till 7 just thinking about things.... then i heard it. how wonderful! it's raining outside. just sprinkling a little but still-it's raining! i love summer rains... but really I don't mind winter rains either.
anyway. sorry i haven't blogged more about our wonderful vacation... I've had this gnarly head cold all week long. feeling pretty poopy still. lame. to top it off i only have one day off from work... yes today. that's it. lame. to top that off even more, I started my math class this week for school. *bleh* I forget how much homework you have with math classes. and how much I HATE story problems. seriously.
anyway. think I might go to farmer's market this morning...since it's so nice and cool out it'll be a nice morning to stroll around... have a wonderful Saturday friends.

the start

2008-06-16T14:17:00.000-07:00

*whew* hello friends. back from vacation. team coverdale wishes they were still gone....:) we had a great time though. 10 days away from life really did us some good. i have a lot to blog about...but to the suggestion of my husband, i'll break it up. apparently i've been known for having some way-too-long-blogs-that-no-one-really-wants-to-read-all-at-once...so i'll do you a favor..split up the stories :)
we spent our first night in my hometown of Coos bay, Oregon with my grandparents. they are seriously so cute. they live in this new "apartment" that's above my uncle's coffee shop. pretty sweet little place. i'd totally live there...except it's in coos bay. great town...just maybe a little too small for team coverdale. jeremy got some sweet pictures..from our whole trip... but even of coos bay..we walked up to this park called Mingus Park that I used to play in and feed the ducks :) looked a lot smaller than it used to be....weird how that happens...anyway-go look at Jeremy's page..i'm sure he'll be posting pictures as the week goes by. they have this community garden about 4 blocks from my grandparents new place that is INcredible. really inspired me. seriously community-there's no reason that we couldn't do one!! walking through gardens is so therapeutic for me..i can't wait to someday have a nice to one :) but for now, i'll stick to having all my veggies in pots randomly positioned outside:) anyway, Coos bay treated us nicely.. had some great coffee, good food, and wonderful family time. got to see my little cousins too that aren't so little anymore. Seriously, why is everyone getting older but I still feel the same? if you ever want to buy some delish coffee..check out my uncle's roasting company, my grandparents have been doing the roasting ever since it's been around.. I may be a little partial but I pretty much think it's some of the best coffee I've tasted...chances are if you ever are over at our house and we make you a coffee, it's the whiskey run espresso..occasionally I give in to the man and buy Starbucks b/c it's convenient.. and now that some of my friends work there, I guess it's another reason to support the man. whatever..
anyway.. that was just part one. i'm tired. need to take a nap. we ended up getting home around 8 last night from vacation... then my alarm went off at 4:30 this a.m. *bleh* oh well, that extra night in portland was totally worth it.... loves you all. come visit team coverdale...we missed you.

3....2....1.....

2008-06-04T20:01:00.000-07:00

vacation starts tomorrow at 2:01 p.m.... Team Coverdale is SO ready for this vaca. *whew* can't wait. Coos Bay on Friday night-staying with the grandparents... I don't care what we do while we're there...but I'm going to the ocean. I need to see the Oregon coast....its been TOO long. . . then off to Portland for 2 nights..a little anniversary present for Jeremy and i.... hopefully we'll get to see a couple friends....but mainly we're just going to explore.... be young.... drink some tasty brews...enjoy just being away...then we're up to Seattle for the rest of the time...oh Seattle. I'm so excited to see you again...Thanks Christian for the heads up on Kel's and the Matador :) We'll have a Guinness and some tequila in your honor :) ew but not at the same time... *bleh*
anyway.....
it's been a good week. busy. but good. monday was our anniversary :) 1 year *whew* it's been incredible. I grilled up some tasty ribs and corn on the cob. I was a little nervous b/c my mother in law Patty, makes some killer ribs and I wasn't sure if I could live up to them...but Jeremy said they were delicious:) Check out what I got from Jeremy...... :)

oh yea..they're the rachael ray knives. I love them..they are aMAzing! Just like my husband. He made a pazookie..it was SO good....seriously. if you haven't experienced pazookie, google it. make some....
tuesday night has turned into terrific tuesday in my mind :) Team Harrison comes over for dinner, we bbq and then we watch Hell's Kitchen. Great company. Great food. Tasty beverages. Hilarious T.V.... Shake face's (which I still can't do :(..... This week Team Coverdale has the pleasure of having Christian over for dinner...nice guy that Christian. Team Ostrom. C-money. that's what we'll call you. come over any time.
we love our new bbq...seriously. all we do is grill now. . . next thing you know we'll be drinking natty ice in a can....in a koozie. nah, we're bad ass grillers.... not white trash grillers..... check out what we did last night... Chicken Kebabs w/Peaches & Onions (with an apricot-vinegar marinade)... *yum* even if the peaches did fall off....
and Grilled Beer Drumsticks and Potato Slabs.... dElish. even if jeremy lost a potato... those tongs can be kinda tricky ya know? :)
........ it's been a good week. . . Team Coverdale won't be back till June 15th... don't miss us too much :) We love you all.

happy year baby!

2008-06-02T14:47:00.000-07:00

june 2. 2008 minus june 2. 2007= 1 year of marriage!
1 year of marriage= lots of love+memories+smiles+laughter+tears+joy+amazing moments+late nights+incredible smiles+miscommunications+jokes+prayer+kisses...................
it really has been year? the year has flown by like whoa. I love Jeremy even more today than I did 1 year ago when I said "I do." I feel so lucky and blessed to be on Team Coverdale, I couldn't ask for a better person to share this life with. I love you Jeremy Coverdale. Thank you for an incredible year of life. I can't wait for the next one..and the next one..and the one after that..:) I love you baby.
-me

x2

2008-06-01T20:29:00.000-07:00

i don't think i've ever told anyone this before...but when i'm worshipping... God gives me the tingles. not the shivers. the tingles. it's weird. it's incredible. i feel like the Holy Spirit is just moving through every inch of my body. it's amazing. it's why I worship. tonight at the Stirring
I got the tingles like whoa. sometimes the music just hits me right. sometimes my heart is just in the right place. sometimes I'm actually worshipping instead of wondering who just came down the stairs. this is why i sit on the side. i like to worship in solitude. but i love the energy God allows us to feel when we're together in community worshipping. there is something amazing about it. the sky outside is giving me tingles. whew. God is such an amazing artist. i live in a beautiful city. with beautiful people. with lots of tingles.....